[ THEME SONG PLAYS ]
* I BET WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR A MILLION YEARS *
* AND I'LL BET WE'LL BE TOGETHER FOR A MILLION MORE *
* OH, IT'S LIKE I STARTED BREATHING *
* ON THE NIGHT WE KISSED
* AND I CAN'T REMEMBER WHAT I EVER DID BEFORE *
* WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY
* WITHOUT US?
* WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY
* WITHOUT US?
* AND THERE AIN'T NO NOTHIN' *
* WE CAN'T LOVE EACH OTHER THROUGH *
* OOH-HOO
* WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY
* WITHOUT US?
* SHA-LA-LA-LA
WHAT COLOR SHOULD I MAKE THE HAIR, UNCLE NICK?
ANY COLOR, ANDY.
LET'S SEE, GREEN AND PURPLE
ARE GOOD COLORS FOR HAIR.
YEAH, THEY'RE FABULOUS.
PURPLE.
NO, NO, NO. ANDY, ANDY.
ANDY, YOU DON'T WANT TO DRAW SOMEONE WITH PURPLE HAIR.
WHY NOT?
BECAUSE NORMAL PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE PURPLE HAIR.
ASIDE FROM YOUR FAMILY,
EVERYBODY I KNOW HAS GOT PURPLE HAIR.
I REPEAT -- NORMAL PEOPLE DO NOT HAVE PURPLE HAIR.
WHAT DOES THAT GOT TO DO WITH ANYTHING, ANYWAY?
YOU KNOW, AN ARTIST SEES COLORS THAT NOBODY ELSE CAN SEE.
THAT'S RIGHT.
EVERYBODY GIVES OFF A DIFFERENT COLOR.
THEY'RE CALLED AURAS,
AND THEY REPRESENT THE SPIRIT OF THAT PERSON.
IS THAT SO?
I MEAN NICK, FOR INSTANCE, IS A FIERY RED.
AND ANDY IS A BRIGHT, BRILLIANT BLUE.
AND YOU'RE -- YOU'RE SORT OF...
YOU DON'T HAVE A COLOR, ALEX.
LOOK, THIS IS A SIMPLE REPUBLICAN HEROES COLORING BOOK.
NOW, THE ONLY COLORS THAT SHOULD BE USED FOR HAIR IN THIS BOOK
IS BROWN, BLACK, RED, BLOND, AND BALD.
ALL RIGHT, ANDY, HUMOR HIM.
MAKE THE HAIR BLOND, BUT PUT IT IN A MOHAWK.
NO, NO, NO, NO. WAIT A MINUTE, WAIT A MINUTE.
YOU'RE NOT GIVING RONALD REAGAN A MOHAWK.
YOU'RE RIGHT. HE'S IN ENOUGH TROUBLE.
OKAY, TIME FOR BED.
ALL RIGHT, HEY, COME ON. I'LL TAKE YOU UP, HUH?
ALL RIGHT, I'LL BE UP IN A COUPLE MINUTES
TO MAKE SURE YOUR PAJAMAS MATCH.
KISS. THANK YOU.
[ IMITATES ROCKET BLASTING OFF ]
BYE.
GOOD NIGHT, MALLORY.
GOOD NIGHT, ANDY.
UGH. THESE NIGHTS MOM AND DAD GO OUT ARE TOUGH.
I THINK IT'S SWEET.
AND IT'S NICE FOR THEM TO GET OUT.
YOU KNOW, ONCE A WEEK MEETING DOWNTOWN
FOR DINNER OR A MOVIE, JUST THE TWO OF THEM.
IT'S THE KIND OF THING THAT KEEPS THEM SO CLOSE.
I'M NOT SAYING YOU'RE NOT ENTITLED TO AN OPINION.
I'M JUST SAYING THAT I HAVE TO QUESTION
THE DEPTH OF ANYONE WHO DOESN'T LIKE THAT MOVIE.
THAT'S ALL.
I SEE.
WHAT MOVIE DID YOU GO TO?
"OUT OF AFRICA."
AND YOU LIKED IT, MOM?
OH, OH, IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I LAUGHED. I CRIED.
I WAS TRANSPORTED TO ANOTHER TIME AND PLACE.
DAD?
REMEMBER UNCLE EDDIE'S SLIDES
OF HIS TRIP TO AFRICA?
SURE.
SAME THING.
EXCEPT INSTEAD OF UNCLE EDDIE AND AUNT RHODA,
THIS HAD ROBERT REDFORD AND MERYL STREEP.
I'M SO SICK OF YOU PUTTING DOWN MERYL STREEP.
I'M SICK OF YOU PUTTING DOWN AUNT RHODA.
OKAY, LOOK, BEFORE THIS GETS ENTIRELY OUT OF HAND,
LET'S NOT FORGET THE FILMS THAT WE HAVE BOTH LOVED
OVER THE YEARS.
GOOD IDEA.
"GONE WITH THE WIND."
"ANNIE HALL."
"IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE." "ADAM'S RIB."
"IT HAPPENED ONE NIGHT." "CASABLANCA."
"E.T."
PHONE HOME.PHONE HOME.
WELL, THEY SEEM HAPPY.
OH, KIDS, KIDS, KIDS, I ALMOST FORGOT.
I'VE GOT BIG NEWS FOR YOU.
WHAT? WHAT IS IT, DAD?
THE STATION HAS DECIDED TO AWARD A SCHOLARSHIP
IN INDEPENDENT STUDY IN ANY FIELD.
NOW, THE COMPETITION IS OPEN
ONLY TO CHILDREN OF WKS EMPLOYEES.
HOW MUCH MONEY WILL I WIN?
THE ACTUAL AWARD IS $2,500,
BUT THERE'S NO GUARANTEEING YOU'LL WIN.
NOW, WE EXPECT TO HAVE OVER 100 APPLICANTS.
UH, COULD I GET THAT IN ONE LUMP SUM?
OR CAN I HAVE SOME OF IT DEFERRED
TO THE END OF THE FISCAL YEAR?
WHY DON'T YOU JUST HAVE YOUR BUSINESS MANAGER GIVE US A CALL.
I HAVE ONE HERE FOR YOU, TOO, MAL.
HUH?
YOU'RE ELIGIBLE --
YOU'RE 19. YOU'RE IN COLLEGE.
YEAH, MAL. GO AHEAD, APPLY.
THANKS, ALEX.
NO, I'M SERIOUS, MAL. APPLY. APPLY.
THERE'S NOTHING IN HERE
THAT SAYS YOU HAVE TO BE GOING TO A REAL COLLEGE.
ALEX, DON'T WORRY.
I HAVE NO INTENTION OF APPLYING
FOR THIS SILLY LITTLE SCHOLARSHIP.
OH, WHY NOT, MAL?
IT'S OPEN TO EVERYONE.
NOW, IT'S NOT JUST FOR ACADEMIC ACHIEVEMENT.
ARTISTS, MUSICIANS, ANYONE.
NO. THANKS ANYWAY, DAD.
WELL...
I WONDER IF I COULD HAVE THIS DEPOSITED
DIRECTLY INTO MY SWISS ACCOUNT.
ALEX, I AM NOT WRITING
A LETTER OF RECOMMENDATION FOR YOU.
COME ON. JEN, LOOK,
I NEED A RECOMMENDATION FROM SOMEONE OTHER THAN MY PARENTS
WHO KNOWS ME AND LIKES ME.
I SEE YOUR PROBLEM.
WHAT'S IT FOR, ANYWAY?
SOMETHING WHERE IF YOU WIN, YOU LEAVE HOME, I HOPE.
IT'S A SCHOLARSHIP FROM YOUR FATHER'S STATION.
NOW WILL YOU WRITE IT, PLEASE?
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY?
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
JUST, UH -- JUST THE USUAL STUFF.
YOU KNOW, BRIGHT, ELEGANT, BRILLIANT, CHARMING.
I GOT A FORM LETTER UPSTAIRS. YOU CAN FOLLOW THAT.
THIS IS INTERESTING.
LOOK WHAT HE HAS DOWN FOR CAREER GOAL --
WORLD DOMINATION.
THAT'S OUR BOY.
IT SAYS IT'S OPEN TO ALL WKS EMPLOYEES' CHILDREN.
IS MALLORY APPLYING?
NO, AND SHE JUST DOESN'T SEEM INTERESTED, EITHER.
HI.
MALLORY, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE NOT GOING TO APPLY
FOR THIS SCHOLARSHIP.
IT'S SEEMS RIGHT UP YOUR ALLEY.
JEN, WHAT WOULD BE THE POINT?
I CAN'T COMPETE WITH ALEX.
WHY NOT?
YOU'RE JUST AS GOOD IN FASHION
AS HE IS IN MONEY-HOARDING
OR -- OR WHATEVER IT IS HE DOES.
I SAVED THE OTHER APPLICATION.
IT'S UPSTAIRS ON MY BUREAU.
I'LL GET IT.
JEN...
MOM, I DON'T THINK IT'S SUCH A GOOD IDEA IF I ENTER.
I DON'T WANT TO PRESSURE YOU INTO ANYTHING,
BUT I'VE JUST SEEN YOU COME SO FAR THIS YEAR.
YOU KNOW, YOU'VE JUST GROWN SO MUCH.
WHY DON'T YOU TAKE A CHANCE?
YOU KNOW, JUST TAKE A RISK.
THIS IS CRAZY. I'M NOT GONNA WIN, MOM.
I'M NOT GOOD AT THESE KINDS OF COMPETITIONS.
IT'S EASY TO SIT ON THE SIDELINES
AND NOT TAKE A CHANCE.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE SAFE THERE. YOU WON'T GET HURT.
BUT IF YOU DO THAT,
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW HOW GOOD YOU CAN BE.
YOU KNOW, I DO HAVE THIS IDEA FOR A LINE OF CLOTHING
FOR WOMEN IN THE BUSINESS WORLD.
IT SOUNDS INTERESTING.
OH, I DON'T KNOW, MOM.
ALEX WILL LAUGH AT ME.
HE'S NOT GONNA LAUGH AT YOU.
HE WILL RESPECT YOU FOR TAKING A CHANCE.
ALEX, UM, GUESS WHAT.
I'M THINKING OF APPLYING FOR THE WKS SCHOLARSHIP.
[ CHUCKLES ]
[ LAUGHS ]
I'M SORRY.
HEY, MOM, WHERE'S MAL?
SHE'S UPSTAIRS WORKING ON HER FASHION PROJECT.
[ CHUCKLES ] SHE'S REALLY GOING THROUGH WITH THIS THING, HUH?
YES, SHE IS.
AND IT TOOK A LOT OF COURAGE FOR HER TO ENTER THIS COMPETITION, TOO.
YOU KNOW, I THINK SHE DESERVES OUR SUPPORT.
SHE IS YOUR SISTER.
YEAH, WELL, THAT MAY BE TRUE
FROM A STRAIGHT, GENETIC VIEWPOINT,
BUT I'VE HAD TO PUT A LID
ON ALL THE WARM, BROTHERLY FEELINGS
THAT WOULD OTHERWISE SHOW THROUGH.
THAT MUST BE A STRUGGLE FOR YOU.
MALLORY AND I ARE IN COMPETITION.
THE MOMENT SHE ENTERED THIS,
SHE CEASED TO BE MY SISTER AND BECAME MY RIVAL.
WE ARE TECHNICALLY AT WAR.
SO, REALLY, NOTHING'S CHANGED.
HI, ALEX.
HEY -- HEY, MAL.
EXCUSE ME, MAL.
I'M WORKING ON MY PROJECT HERE.
WE ARE IN COMPETITION.
DON'T THINK IT'S RIGHT FOR YOU TO BE SNOOPING AROUND.
JEN, COME OVER HERE AND LOOK AT THESE THINGS.
I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW GREAT MY DESIGNS ARE COMING OUT.
OH, LET ME SEE.
I MEAN, LOOK AT THIS SLEEVE.
OOH.
WHICH DO YOU LIKE BETTER -- THIS OR THIS?
OH, DEFINITELY THIS ONE.
OKAY. GREAT.
STEP UP HERE.
AND I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT IT'S GONNA LOOK LIKE.
YOU KNOW, MALLORY, AS WE SPEAK,
THE OTHER APPLICANTS ARE WORKING ON THEIR PROJECTS.
THERE ARE COMPUTER-SCIENCE STUDENTS CREATING SOFTWARE,
BIOLOGY STUDENTS DISCOVERING ENZYMES,
BRILLIANT ECONOMICS WIZARDS
COMPLETELY RESTRUCTURING THIS COUNTRY'S MONETARY SYSTEM.
DO YOU REALLY EXPECT TO TRIUMPH
OVER THAT KIND OF COMPETITION
SIMPLY BY DRAPING A BLANKET OVER JENNIFER?
NOBODY ASKED YOU, ALEX.
ALL RIGHT. OKAY. HEY, MAL, SORRY.
JUST TRYING TO BRACE YOU
FOR THE HUGE AND INEVITABLE DISAPPOINTMENT
THAT'S COMING YOUR WAY.
LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, ALEX.
FOR 19 YEARS, I'VE WATCHED YOU WIN EVERYTHING
WITH NO HOPE OF EVEN COMPETING WITH YOU.
IT'D BE VERY EASY FOR ME TO SAY, "FORGET IT, MALLORY.
YOU'LL ALWAYS BE SECOND-RATE."
BUT I REFUSE TO DO THAT.
I'VE DECIDED THAT NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY,
I'M GONNA KEEP TRYING.
'CAUSE IF I DON'T, I MAY AS WELL JUST ROLL OVER AND PLAY DEAD.
GOOD GOING, ALEX.
I HOPE YOU'RE REAL PROUD OF YOURSELF.
YOU JUST MADE MALLORY FEEL COMPLETELY WORTHLESS.
I DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE IN THE SAME ROOM WITH YOU.
COULD YOU UNPIN ME, PLEASE?
OKAY, ALEX, WE BETTER GET GOING. THE INTERVIEW STARTS IN HALF AN HOUR.
YEAH, ALL RIGHT, DAD.
JUST GOING OVER SOME LAST-MINUTE NOTES HERE.
"THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
"YOU ARE TOO KIND.
PLEASE STOP."
ALL RIGHT. I'M READY.
I'LL JUST PUT THESE IN THE U-HAUL
WITH YOUR OTHER BOOKS AND CHARTS.
OH, DAD, DID YOU GET THAT BOX OF 3-D GLASSES?
RIGHT HERE.
GOOD STUFF. [ DOOR CLOSES ]
OH, HEY, MAL.
IS ALL THAT STUFF FOR YOUR PRESENTATION?
UH, YEAH.
YOU WANT SOME HELP?
NO. THANKS.
ARE YOU SURE?
YES.
I CAN HANDLE IT PERFECTLY WELL ON MY OWN.
AH! OKAY, LOOK --
IT'S FINE, ALEX. EVERYTHING'S UNDER CONTROL.
DID YOU MAKE THIS?
YES.
IF I WERE -- IF I WERE A WOMAN...
AND HAD A BETTER FIGURE...
...I'D BE CLAMORING AFTER THIS.
I TRIED TO DESIGN A LINE OF CLOTHING
FOR THE WORKING WOMAN.
'CAUSE WOMEN HAVE A HARD TIME BEING TAKEN SERIOUSLY
IN THE BUSINESS WORLD.
WOMEN NOT BEING TAKEN SERIOUSLY?
GOD KNOWS WHY.
SO I DESIGNED A LINE OF CLOTHING
THAT A WOMAN CAN WEAR IN THE MAN'S WORLD
WITHOUT HIDING THE FACT THAT SHE'S A WOMAN.
THIS IS GREAT.
YOU, UH -- YOU SAW A DEMAND IN THE MARKET
AND YOU SET OUT TO FILL IT.
THAT IS GOOD BUSINESS.
HEY, THESE SKETCHES AREN'T BAD, EITHER --
ATTRACTIVE, PROFESSIONAL.
THANKS, ALEX.
ALTHOUGH YOU COULD HAVE SHOWN
A LITTLE MORE LEG ON THIS ONE.
I'M KIDDING. I'M KIDDING.
THESE ARE GREAT.
THANKS.
I'M SURE YOUR PRESENTATION IS REALLY GREAT, TOO.
OH, YEAH, IT IS. YOU WANT TO HEAR IT?
NO.
GOOD LUCK, ALEX.
YEAH.
GOOD LUCK TO YOU, MAL.
AHH, I JUST POPPED IN TO SEE IF YOU HAD YOUR INTERVIEW YET.
NO.
I'M SURE YOU'LL DO GREAT.
WHERE'S ALEX?
[ LAUGHTER ]
AHH.
WELL, UH, STOP BY MY OFFICE WHEN YOU'RE DONE
AND YOU CAN TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT.
OKAY.
GOOD LUCK.
THANKS.
[ LAUGHTER ]
Mrs. Simpson: BRAVO! BRAVO!
BRAVO!
YOU'RE TOO KIND.
PLEASE STOP.
[ LAUGHS ]
THANKS.
YOUR PRESENTATION WAS AMAZING, ALEX,
AND THE EFFECTS WERE INCREDIBLE.
WHEN THAT DOLLAR BILL STARTED SPINNING OUT TOWARDS ME,
I JUMPED OUT OF MY SEAT.
[ LAUGHS ]
MALLORY?
WHAT?
WE'RE READY FOR YOU NOW.
OH.
HEY, COME ON, MAL. YOU'RE NEXT.
RIGHT.
OH, HEY, MAL?
KNOCK 'EM DEAD.
THANKS.
MALLORY, WE ALL FOUND YOUR APPLICATION
VERY INTERESTING.
THANK YOU.
AND WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR ORAL PRESENTATION.
YOU MAY BEGIN.
WELL, A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK FASHION IS SILLY,
BUT IT'S NOT.
IT REFLECTS SOCIAL VALUES
AND, MORE IMPORTANTLY, SOMETIMES DETERMINES THEM.
HOW SO?
WELL, IN THE BUSINESS WORLD,
THE, UH, TRADITIONAL MAN'S DARK SUIT...
WHICH -- SORRY --
PERSONALLY, I FIND A LITTLE BORING.
UM...
...KEEPS IT A MALE-DOMINATED WORLD
BECAUSE IN ORDER FOR A WOMAN TO FIT IN,
SHE HAS TO PRETEND SHE'S A MAN AND DRESS LIKE ONE.
HEAR, HEAR!
AND I ALSO THINK IF PEOPLE DRESSED MORE COMFORTABLY,
THEY -- THEY COULD IMPROVE THEIR EFFICIENCY.
SO, I'VE DESIGNED A LINE OF CLOTHING
FOR THE WORKING WOMAN --
COMFORTABLE, AUTHORITATIVE,
AND YET STILL FEMININE.
OH! WONDERFUL!
IF YOU'LL REFER TO MY CHART ON DEMOGRAPHICS...
OH! WONDERFUL!
AND SO, AS YOU CAN SEE,
THIS COLOR DOES MORE FOR HER COMPLEXION AND MOOD.
NOT THAT IT'S BETTER THAN WHAT YOU'RE WEARING ALREADY.
NO, IT'S MUCH BETTER.
AW.
NOW, MRS. SIMPSON, DON'T YOU JUST FEEL GREAT IN THIS FABRIC?
OH, YES!
SEE? THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT.
FASHION REALLY DOES MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
YES. BRAVO, MALLORY. WONDERFUL.
[ LAUGHTER ]
UH, MR. WERTZ?
UH, SO... WHAT'S THE GOOD WORD?
YOUR SISTER GAVE A SPLENDID INTERVIEW, ALEX.
[ CLEARS THROAT ] OH, REALLY? REALLY?
GREAT. GOOD.
HEY, THAT IS A NICE COLOR ON YOU.
ISN'T IT, THOUGH? YOUR SISTER SUGGESTED IT.
I GUESSED THAT.
SHE'S WONDERFUL.
SHE'S STILL IN THERE CHATTING WITH SOME OF THE PANEL.
YEAH, UH, SO, HOW MANY -- HOW MANY APPLICANTS
DO YOU HAVE LEFT TO INTERVIEW?
NONE. YOU TWO WERE THE LAST ONES.
AH, SO YOU'LL BE AWARDING
THAT SCHOLARSHIP PRETTY SOON, HUH?
WELL, WE HAVEN'T VOTED OFFICIALLY YET...
YEAH, BUT YOU KNOW, RIGHT?
WELL...
COME ON, MR. WERTZ.
HONESTLY, ALEX, YOU'RE LIKE A KID ON CHRISTMAS EVE.
I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW.
BUT, LOOK, I'M GONNA FIND OUT LATER ON TODAY ANYWAY, RIGHT?
I SUPPOSE THAT'S TRUE.
Congratulations, Alex.
You won the WKS scholarship.
Yes! Shh!
Thank you. Thank you, Mr. Wertz.
Thank you.
YOU DESERVE IT.
JUST REMEMBER TO LOOK SURPRISED
WHEN YOU FIND OUT.
OH, HEY, MR. WERTZ.
UH, JUST, UH -- JUST OUT OF CURIOSITY,
HOW DID MALLORY FINISH IN THE RUNNING?
SHE WAS OUR SECOND CHOICE, RIGHT AFTER YOU.
OH.
WELL, THOSE -- THOSE ARE THE BREAKS, RIGHT?
WELL, I BETTER BE GETTING BACK IN.
Congratulations, Alex.
THANK YOU.
[ INDISTINCT CONVERSATION ]
THIS IS GREAT FOR EVENING AND THEN FOR WORK.
ANYTHING, RIGHT.
YOU ARE SO TALENTED.
YOU ARE. YOU HAVE LOTS OF GOOD IDEAS.
ALL RIGHT, I'LL BE BACK LATER FOR ALL...
[ LAUGHS ] OH, ALEX! ALEX!
IT WAS GREAT! I MEAN, I DID REALLY WELL IN THERE.
I ANSWERED ALL THEIR QUESTIONS, RIGHT?
THEY WERE REALLY IMPRESSED WITH MY PRESENTATION.
I THINK I WAS, TOO.
I THINK I'VE REALLY GOT A SHOT AT WINNING THIS SCHOLARSHIP!
OH, MAL, THAT'S TERRIFIC. AHH!
THAT'S TERRIFIC.
I AM SO EXCITED I COULD BURST.
I GOT TO GO TELL DAD. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
[ SIGHS ]
I THOUGHT SHE WAS JUST WONDERFUL.
UH, MR. WERTZ.
WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, SIR,
I'M WITHDRAWING FROM THE COMPETITION.
BUT THAT MEANS --
YEAH.
YEAH, I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.
I WOULDN'T DO THAT IF I WERE YOU.
WHY NOT?
IT'S NOT YOUR MAN.
YO, ALEX.
ALEX, HOW DID YOUR INTERVIEW GO?
OH, FINE, FINE. UH, WHERE'S MALLORY?
WELL, SHE GOT HOME ABOUT AN HOUR AGO.
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
I WAS OUT WALKING.
DO YOU THINK YOU WON?
I DON'T KNOW. HARD TO TELL.
IT'S JUST ANOTHER SCHOLARSHIP.
WHY IS WINNING ALWAYS SO IMPORTANT TO YOU PEOPLE?
HERE IT IS.
IT SAYS WKS RIGHT ON THE ENVELOPE.
HEY, OPEN IT UP, BABE.
I'M AFRAID. YOU OPEN IT.
OH, MALLORY.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.
OH! I WON!
[ ALL CHEERING ]
OH, I WON!
I WON THE SCHOLARSHIP!
SHE BEAT ALEX.
HEY.
CONGRATULATIONS, MAL.
THANKS, ALEX.
Steven: LOOK, ELYSE, I THINK WE HAVE SOME CHAMPAGNE IN THE BASEMENT.
WHY DON'T WE GO GET IT?
OKAY. YEAH, COME ON, GUYS. COME ON.
WELL.
THIS IS THE MOMENT YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR.
LET ME HAVE IT.
OH, COME ON, MAL.
DON'T HOLD BACK.
LET'S SEE SOME GLOATING.
YOU KNOW, I'VE WAITED ALL MY LIFE FOR THIS MOMENT.
I IMAGINED IT SO MANY DIFFERENT WAYS.
THAT DAY, FAR IN THE FUTURE,
WHEN I'M IN THE SPOTLIGHT AND YOU'RE IN THE SHADOW.
I ALWAYS THOUGHT THIS MOMENT
WOULD SOMEHOW OCCUR IN NEW YORK.
YOU'D BE -- YOU'D BE WAITING FOR ME AT SOME SMALL CAFé.
AND I'D COME RUNNING IN BREATHLESS
AND I'D SAY, "LOOK, ALEX,
MY DESIGNS ARE ON THE COVER OF VOGUE."
AND YOU'D SMILE, STAMMER OUT "CONGRATULATIONS."
BUT I'D KNOW, THAT UNDERNEATH THAT TOUPEE...
...YOU WERE -- YOU WERE GREEN WITH ENVY
AND COMPLETELY BALD.
WE'D ENGAGE IN SOME SMALL TALK,
EXCHANGE SOME PLEASANTRIES.
YOU'D TRY TO INTEREST ME IN SOME SHODDY LAND DEAL.
I'D POLITELY DECLINE
AND SAY, "NO, I HAVE TO HEAD UPTOWN.
BUSINESS, YOU KNOW."
AND I'D TURN TO SIGN SOMEONE'S AUTOGRAPH, RIGHT,
AND I'D SEE SOMEONE WALK UP TO YOU
AND SAY, "AREN'T YOU MALLORY KEATON'S BROTHER?
YOU MUST BE SO PROUD."
SO I'D COME BACK, AND I'D -- I'D,
YOU KNOW, SHOVE A FEW BUCKS IN YOUR POCKET.
AND I'D RUFFLE MY FINGERS THROUGH YOUR HAIR
AND SAY GOODBYE.
ONLY AFTER I'M HALFWAY UPTOWN
DO I REALIZE THAT...
I'VE GOT YOUR TOUPEE IN MY PURSE.
THAT'S QUITE A RICH FANTASY LIFE YOU GOT THERE, MAL.
AND YOU'RE ENTITLED TO THE COVER OF VOGUE,
BUT, UH...WHY DO I HAVE TO BE BALD?
YOU KNOW, NOW THAT I'M HERE,
NOW THAT I'VE WON,
I DON'T FEEL LIKE GLOATING.
I MEAN, I'M EXCITED FOR ME,
BUT I FEEL BAD FOR YOU.
I KNOW HOW MUCH THESE THINGS MEAN TO YOU.
AND I'M SORRY YOU LOST.
THANKS, MAL.
BUT DON'T FEEL BAD FOR ME, OKAY?
BECAUSE I'M HAPPY.
I'M HAPPY FOR YOU.
YOU KNOW, AND MAYBE -- MAYBE THIS COULD BE THE START
OF A NEW MALLORY KEATON --
ONE WHO PUSHES HERSELF,
ONE WHO STRIVES,
ONE WHO REACHES FOR THE BRASS RING AND GETS IT.
AND WHEN THEY ASK ME HOW IT FEELS
TO BE MALLORY KEATON'S BROTHER,
I'M GONNA SAY, "DAMN PROUD."
THANKS, ALEX.
[ GRUNTS ]
BONK, BONK. WHOA. EASY, EASY.
HERE I AM!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
CELEBRATION'S IN THE DINING ROOM, ALEX.
YOU COMING IN?
YEAH, IN A SECOND, DAD.
IT'S TERRIFIC ABOUT MALLORY, ISN'T IT?
YEAH. YEAH, IT SURE IS.
SHE REALLY SEEMS EXCITED.
YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS KNEW SHE HAD IT IN HER.
YEAH, SHE, UH -- SHE SURE DID.
MR. WERTZ TOLD ME WHAT YOU DID.
WHAT? I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
THAT YOU STEPPED DOWN SO MALLORY COULD WIN.
OH, THAT.
OH, YEAH.
IT WAS NO BIG DEAL.
IT WAS A WONDERFUL THING THAT YOU DID.
YOU ACTED IN AN INCREDIBLY COMPASSIONATE
AND GENEROUS FASHION.
YOU DIDN'T THINK OF YOURSELF AT ALL.
WELL, I FIGURE IN LIFE
YOU SHOULD TRY EVERYTHING ONCE.
HEY, THANKS, DAD.
YOU GAVE HER A GREAT GIFT.
DAD...
...CAN I BORROW 2,500 BUCKS?