[ THEME SONG PLAYS ] * I BET WE'VE BEEN TOGETHERFOR A MILLION YEARS * * AND I'LL BET WE'LL BE TOGETHERFOR A MILLION MORE * * OH, IT'S LIKEI STARTED BREATHING * * ON THE NIGHT WE KISSED * AND I CAN'T REMEMBERWHAT I EVER DID BEFORE * * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * AND THEREAIN'T NO NOTHIN' * * WE CAN'T LOVEEACH OTHER THROUGH * * OOH-HOO * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * SHA-LA-LA-LA I DON'T MEANTO BE RUDE, BUT DO YOU GUYS MIND IF I USETHIS ROOM FOR A WHILE? OH, NO,GO RIGHT AHEAD. WELL, WHAT I MEAN IS -- WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY -- WANT US TO LEAVE? WELL,NOT RIGHT AWAY. I WAS HOPING YOU COULD HELP MECLEAN UP BEFORE YOU LEFT. DO WE HAVE TO LEAVETHE GROUNDS ALTOGETHER? CAN WE FIND A ROOMSOMEWHERE TO HIDE? OH,YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. SHERRY MARSHALL'SGONNA BE HERE ANY MINUTE, AND I'M ANXIOUS TO MAKEA GOOD IMPRESSION ON HER. WHO IS SHERRY MARSHALL? SHE HAPPENS TO BEA PI NU, THE BEST SORORITYIN THE WHOLE WORLD. SHE'S THE PRESIDENT! IS SHE COMING ALONE OR WITHSOME SECRET SERVICE AGENTS? YESTERDAY, OUT OF ALL THE KIDSIN MRS. POBER'S CLASS, SHERRY PICKED ME TO DOHER SCIENCE PROJECT WITH HER. I THINK SHE MAY ASK METO PLEDGE THE SORORITY, SO I WANT EVERYTHINGTO BE PERFECT. DAD, CAN YOU GIVE ME A HANDWITH SKIPPY? OH, NO! WHY ARE YOUBRINGING HIM IN HERE? IS THAT THE VOICEOF MY BELOVED? IS THAT YOU, MALLORY?! I'M NOT YOUR BELOVED,SKIPPY. WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THISBEFORE. I AM YOUR NEIGHBORAND EX-BABYSITTER. WHAT HAPPENED?! OH, HE WAS GOING OUTFOR A PASS, AND HE RAN INTOTHE POLE. I TOLD YOUTO RUN A DOWN-AND-IN, SKIPPY. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TOGO TO THE POLE AND STOP. I DID -- I STOPPEDWHEN I HIT THE POLE! GET A COLD RAG, HONEY.COME SIT DOWN, SKIPPY. OH, MOM!DON'T LET HIM SIT DOWN! SHERRY'S GONNA BE HEREANY MINUTE. HE'S HURT.HE'S GOT TO SIT DOWN. WELL, THEN, AT LEASTCOVER HIM UP WITH SOMETHING. CAN'T YOU TALK NICELYTO SKIPPY? SORRY, DAD. LISTEN, SKIP, UH... IT'S VITALTHAT YOU LEAVE NOW. SOMEONE VERY IMPORTANTIS ON HER WAY OVER TO SEE ME. OBVIOUSLY, I DON'T WANT HERTO THINK I KNOW YOU. I UNDERSTAND. MUCH BETTER. COME ON, SKIPPY, LET'S TAKEA LOOK AT THAT SCRATCH. Steven: YEAH. [ DOORBELL RINGS ] THAT'S HER!QUICK -- GET HIM OUT OF HERE! OH, MALLORY! HURRY! HURRY!BEFORE SHE SEES ME! HI, SHERRY.COME ON IN. HI. YOU KNOW, I AM REALLY GLADWE'RE PARTNERS. IT'S GONNA BEA LOT OF FUN, AND IT'S A GREAT CHANCE FOR USTO GET TO KNOW ONE ANOTHER. YEAH, GREAT.[ CLEARS THROAT ] WHERE'S ALEX? HUH? ALEX KEATON.ISN'T HE YOUR BROTHER? I SUPPOSETECHNICALLY HE IS, YEAH. ANYWAY, I WAS THINKINGABOUT SOMETHING ALONG THE LINESOF ECOLOGY. MAYBE A CHARTSHOWING THE BREEDING CYCLES -- YEAH.SO, UH, IS HE HERE? WELL, I DON'T KNOW.WE'RE REALLY NOT THAT CLOSE. I RUN INTO HIM NOW AND AGAINDOWN AT THE MARKET. [ WHISTLING ] [ RADIO CHATTER ] OH, I HOPEYOU DON'T MIND. IT'S TIME FORTHE COMMERCE AND SHIPPING NEWS. ALEX, WE DO MIND. WE'RE DOING A PROJECTFOR SCHOOL HERE. ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.I'LL LISTEN TO IT UPSTAIRS. [ RADIO TURNS OFF ] IT'S A LOT MORE EXCITINGIN STEREO, ANYWAY. WAIT. YOU KNOW WHAT?I'LL GO WITH YOU. I JUST LOVE THE COMMERCE AND SHOPPING NEWS. "SHIPPING." AH. RIGHT. YOU KNOW,I DON'T THINK WE'VE MET. I'M SHERRY MARSHALL. GREAT.TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. SO, ANYWAYS, WHAT DO YOU THINKABOUT THE ECOLOGY THING? OR MAYBE YOU HAVESOMETHING ELSE IN MIND. DOES ALEX EVER GO OUTWITH ANY OF YOUR FRIENDS? NO, NEVER. HE SAYS HE HAS SOME KINDOF REPUTATION TO UPHOLD. THAT'S TOO BAD.HE'S REALLY CUTE. I WAS HOPING, UM,WE COULD DOUBLE-DATE SOMETIME. DOUBLE-DATE?ME AND YOU? BUT IF ALEX NEVER GOES OUTWITH YOUR FRIENDS... UH, DID I SAY "NEVER"? I DON'T KNOWWHAT I WAS THINKING. YOU KNOW,COME TO THINK OF IT, THERE'S STILL SOME OPENINGSON OUR SORORITY LIST. WE'RE VOTING ON THEM NEXT WEEKAT OUR BIG DANCE. THAT'D BE A GREAT PLACEFOR A DOUBLE DATE. I FORGOT MY GLOBE. UH, HOW'SYOUR PROJECT COMING? IT'S STARTINGTO SHAPE UP. AH! I'VE COME UPWITH A TERRIFIC IDEA FOR MALLORY'SSCIENCE PROJECT. ISN'T MALLORY SUPPOSED TOCOME UP WITH AN IDEA? HER IDEA WAS FOR DAD TO COME UP WITH IT. ANYWAY,I THINK SHE SHOULD TRY MAKING A SCALE MODELOF A MOLECULE. MALLORY CAN'T EVEN MAKEA SALAD. STEVEN,I CAN SEE IT COMING -- YOU'RE GONNA DOTHE WHOLE PROJECT FOR HER. UNH-UNH. I LEARNED MY LESSON ONTHAT RELIEF MAP OF SOUTH AMERICA I DID FOR JENNIFER. I HAD TO TAKE AN INCOMPLETEON THAT ONE. I EXPLAINED THAT TO YOU,JENNIFER. I RAN OUT OF PASTE. ANYWAY, I STILL THINKYOU SHOULD HAVE HANDED IT IN. MRS. DANNON'SPRETTY SHARP. I THINK SHE WOULD HAVE NOTICEDIF BRAZIL WAS MISSING. HI, HONEY. HI. OKAY. UH, JENNIFER, DON'T SIT THERE.THAT'S ALEX'S CHAIR. SINCE WHEN? WELL,HE PREFERS TO SIT THERE. I THINK WE SHOULD LET ALEXHAVE HIS WAY ON THAT. HE ASKSSO LITTLE OF US. HAVE YOU BEEN UNDERYOUR HAIR DRYER TOO LONG? MORNING.Steven: HEY, ALEX. OH, HI, ALEX.YOUR FAVORITE CHAIR IS READY. I'VE BEEN HOLDING ITFOR YOU. WHAT KIND OF CEREAL WILLYOU BE HAVING THIS MORNING? THIS KIND. LET ME GET THATFOR YOU. UH, WOULD YOU LIKE SOME TOASTTO GO WITH THAT? NO, I'M, UH...I'M GOING IN EARLY THIS MORNING. I HAVEN'T GOT TIMETO WAIT FOR TOAST. WELL, HAVE DAD'S. I'M SORRY, DAD.I-I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WANTED THAT. SURE. T-THERE WAS NO WAYYOU COULD TELL. ALEX,WHAT WOULD YOU SAY IF I TOLD YOUI COULD GET YOU A DATE WITH ONE OF THE MOST POPULARGIRLS IN SCHOOL? I'D SAY THAT I DON'T NEEDYOUR HELP TO DO THAT. LIKE WHO? SHE IS A WONDERFUL GIRLWITH A GREAT PERSONALITY. NO, SOUNDS BAD ALREADY. LOOK, MALLORY, THIS WOULDN'T BEYOUR FRIEND SHERRY, WOULD IT? RIGHT. NO WAY.WHY NOT? WELL, JUST THE FACT THATYOU WANT ME TO GO OUT WITH HER IS ENOUGH REASON NOT TO. THAT'S SWEET. LOOK, ALEX,FOR SOME STRANGE REASON, SHERRY MARSHALLTHINKS YOU'RE CUTE. NOW, I WANT YOUTO GO OUT WITH HER, SAY GREAT THINGS ABOUT ME,AND HELP ME GET INTO PI NU. MALLORY, YOU SOUND A LITTLEDESPERATE ABOUT THE SORORITY. I'M NOT DESPERATE,BUT I WANT TO GET IN. IS IT WORTHJOINING THE SORORITY, THOUGH, IF YOU HAVE TO BE MANIPULATIVEAND DECEITFUL TO GET IN? YEAH. AW, MOM, YOU KNOWWHAT THESE THINGS ARE LIKE. THE HARD PARTIS GETTING IN. AND THEN ONCE YOU'RE IN, THEN YOU CAN BE YOURSELF. [ CAR HORN HONKS ] WELL, THAT'S MY RIDE.I GOT TO BE IN EARLY TODAY. OH, WHAT DO YOU SAY,ALEX? SHE REALLY THINKSYOU'RE CUTE. LISTEN, MALLORY,I DON'T GO OUT WITH GIRLS WHO HAVE I.Q.sLOWER THAN ROOM TEMPERATURE, WHO HAVECONTAGIOUS DISEASES, OR WHO AREFRIENDS OF YOURS. AND THERE'S CERTAINLYSOME OVERLAP IN THOSETHREE CATEGORIES. HOW'S YOUR SCIENCE PROJECTGOING, DAD? [ Chuckling ] WELL, IT'S NOT MY SCIENCE PROJECT, JENNIFER. IT'S MALLORY'S.[ CHUCKLES ] HAVING SOME TROUBLEWITH IT. WHAT IS IT? UH, ICE. DON'T LET IT MELT. NO... IT'S NOT REALLY ICE. THIS ISA PERFECT REPRESENTATION OF A GROUPOF CRYSTALLIZED WATER MOLECULES. YOUR FATHER'S VERY PROUD OF IT.HE'S HOPING FOR AN "A." [ CHUCKLES ] ALEX, WHY WON'T YOUHELP ME OUT ON THIS? IT'S JUST ONE DATE.THAT'S ALL. IT'S THE PRINCIPLE,MALLORY. I AM NOT SOME CHEAP FLOOZYAVAILABLE FOR ONE-NIGHT STANDS WITH PEOPLEYOU WANT TO IMPRESS. NEXT THING, YOU'LL BE ASKING METO JUMP OUT OF A CAKE. HI. HOPE I'M NOTINTERRUPTING ANYTHING. HI, SKIPPY. ACTUALLY, NO.WE'RE JUST GOING IN TO DINNER. AS LUCK WOULD HAVE IT,I'M FREE FOR DINNER TONIGHT! THAT IS LUCKY. FORGET IT, SKIPPY. SHE'S KIDDING. YOU'RE WELCOMETO STAY FOR DINNER. BUT CALL YOUR MOTHER. SHE SENT ME OVER. SO, SKIPPY,WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MY -- I MEAN, UH, MALLORY'S,UH, SCIENCE PROJECT? WELL, MY DAD-- I MEAN, MINE CAME OUT BETTER. MALLORY'SNOT FINISHED YET. ALEX, I'M NOT JUST HEREFOR DINNER TONIGHT. I'M HEREFOR A VICTORY CELEBRATION. CONGRATULATE MEAND PAY ME. WHAT ARE YOUBABBLING ABOUT? WELL, REMEMBER THAT BET WE MADEABOUT SIX YEARS AGO THAT I WOULD NEVER GETANY GRADE HIGHER THAN A "C"IN SCHOOL? WELL,READ THIS AND WEEP. THIS ISA HYGIENE TEST. THIS DOESN'T COUNT. LOOK AT THESE QUESTIONS. "WHEN DO YOU USE SOAP?" HOW COULD YOU MISS THAT? A TEST IS A TEST, ALEX!YOU OWE ME 50 BUCKS! I HAVEN'T GOT50 BUCKS. IT'S DINNERTIME --FOR ONE OF YOU. YOUR MOTHER SAIDI COULD STAY, MALLORY. SHE'S HAD A HIGH FEVER, SKIPPY.SHE HASN'T BEEN HERSELF. SKIP. IF I CAN GET MALLORYTO LET YOU STAY FOR DINNER, WILL YOUKNOCK 5 BUCKS OFF? I'LL TAKE OFF $10. YOU DRIVE A HARD BARGAIN,SKIPPY. YOU KNOW, I COULD BE PERSUADEDTO, UH, FORGET THE ENTIRE $50 IF YOU COULD GET MALLORYTO...GO OUT WITH ME. I'D LOVE TO GO ALONG WITH YOUON THAT ONE, SKIP, BUT LET'S TRY AND STAYIN THE REAL WORLD HERE. WELL,IT'S JUST A CHANCE FOR US TO HELP EACH OTHER OUT,THAT'S ALL. DINNER ISON THE TABLE! MALLORY, UH, CAN I TALK TO YOUFOR A SECOND? WHAT IS IT? I WAS THINKING,MALLORY... YESTERDAY, YOU CAME TO MEIN YOUR HOUR OF NEED TO ASK OF ME A FAVOR. I THINK THAT MY REJECTIONMIGHT HAVE BEEN A LITTLE HASTY. YOU MEANYOU'LL GO OUT WITH SHERRY? YEAH, I-I THINK SO. GREAT!THAT IS WONDERFUL! UH, THERE IS, HOWEVER,ONE SMALL FAVOR THAT I'D LIKE TO ASKOF YOU. NAME IT. ANYTHING. I'D LIKE YOU TO GO OUT ON A DATE WITH, UH... YOUNG IRWIN, HERE. I'D RATHERENTER A CONVENT. I'M FLATTEREDBY THE COMPETITION. COME ON, MALLORY,WE CAN MAKE THIS PALATABLE. IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BEA LONG DATE. YOU DON'T EVENHAVE TO BE CIVIL. DO I HAVE TO TALKTO HIM? SKIP? WELL, A COUPLE OF WORDSWOULD BE NICE. OF COURSEYOU'LL HAVE TO TALK TO HIM. THEN IT'S OFF. CONVERSATION'S OVERRATED,SKIPPY. THE IMPORTANT THING ISYOU'LL BE TOGETHER. OKAY, FORGET THE TALKING.I'M FLEXIBLE ON THAT ONE. DO I HAVE TO GO OUT IN PUBLICWITH HIM? THAT'S UP TO ALEX. YEAH, I'M AFRAID SO.SEE, WE'LL DOUBLE-DATE. WE'LL GO TOGETHERTO THE PI NU DANCE. I'M NOT DANCINGWITH HIM. THERE'S NOT GONNA BEANY DANCING, SKIPPY. THERE'S GOT TO BE DANCING.THIS POINT IS NON-NEGOTIABLE. I DON'T THINKHE'S BLUFFING, MALLORY. ALL RIGHT, ONE DANCE. TWO DANCES -- ONE SLOW. MALLORY? I'D ALMOST RATHER DIETHAN DO THIS. SOUNDS LIKE A "YES"TO ME, SKIP. NOW, DON'T LAY IT ONTOO THICK, OKAY? I MEAN, TELL SHERRYHOW WONDERFUL I AM AND ALL THAT, BUT DON'T GET TOO GUSHYABOUT IT. I'LL TRYAND CONTROL MYSELF. HEY, YOU TWO GUYSLOOK GREAT. OH, YOU REALLY THINK SO?I'M SO NERVOUS. WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? THE BIG DEAL IS THAT MY LIFE,MY REPUTATION, MY ENTIRE SOCIAL STATUSIS IN ALEX'S HANDS. THEN YOUSHOULDN'T BE NERVOUS. OH? YOU SHOULD PANIC. WELL, EVERYBODYALL READY TO GO? Alex: YEAH.I GUESS. YOU LOOK TERRIFIC,MALLORY. THANKS, MOM. MALLORY, UH, THIS IS FOR YOUFROM MOM AND ME. OH, THANK YOU! NOW, I WAS UNDERTHE IMPRESSION THAT YOU TWO WEREN'T TOO CRAZYABOUT THE IDEA OF MY JOINING. WELL, WE'RE NOT HAPPYABOUT THE WAY YOU'RE GETTING IN, BUT WE KNOWIT'S IMPORTANT TO YOU. ALEX, WHAT MADE YOUCHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT GOING OUTWITH SHERRY? WELL, I, UH,I THOUGHT IT OVER, AND I REALIZED THAT IF IT MEANTTHAT MUCH TO MALLORY, IT MEANS THAT MUCH TO ME. OKAY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL USIF YOU DON'T WANT TO. [ DOORBELL RINGS ] Steven: SKIP! SKIPPY,WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? I TOLD YOUI'D MEET YOU THERE. I KNOW, BUT YOU DIDN'T TELL MEWHERE IT WAS. UH, M-MALLORY,I DON'T MEAN TO PRY, BUT I'M KIND OF SURPRISEDTHAT, UH, YOU AND SKIP -- WELL, I MEAN,THAT THE TWO OF YOU -- THAT WE'RE GOING OUTON A "DATE"? YEAH. I HAD TO DO IT. IT'S THE ONLY WAY I COULD GETALEX TO GO OUT WITH SHERRY. YEAH, YOU SEE, UH,I'M GOING OUT WITH SHERRY SO MALLORY WILL GO OUTWITH SKIPPY SO I DON'T HAVE TO PAY SKIPPYTHE MONEY I OWE HIM ON A STUPID BET. AH, TO BE YOUNGAND IN LOVE. [ MID-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYING ] SO, THIS ISA GREAT SORORITY. ALL GIRLS, RIGHT? RIGHT.[ CHUCKLES ] WELL, I THINKYOU'RE MAKING A GREAT MOVE ASKING MY SISTERTO JOIN. I MEAN, SHE IS A GIRLAND EVERYTHING. ALEX...DID ANYONEEVER TELL YOU THAT YOU HAVEA REALLY CUTE NOSE? THIS ONE?YEAH. YEAH, I LIKE THE WAY IT JUSTSITS RIGHT THERE, JUST RIGHT IN THE MIDDLEOF YOUR FACE. WELL, I'VE TRIEDOTHER LOCATIONS, BUT I'VE ALWAYS FOUNDTHAT THIS ONE WORKS BEST. YOU'RE FUNNY, ALEX. YOU KNOW... I FIND A SENSE OF HUMORIN A MAN TO BE INCREDIBLY...SEXUALLY EXCITING. A PRIEST AND A RABBIARE IN A ROWBOAT... HI, YOU TWO.HAVING FUN? WE WERE. NOW, DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHINGALEX TELLS YOU. I DO HAVE SOME FLAWS. HERE'S ONE NOW. SO, ALEX, HOW YOU DOINGWITH YOUR WOMAN? [ DANCE MUSIC PLAYING ] COME ON, SKIPPY, I'M GONNAHAVE TO DANCE WITH YOUSOONER OR LATER. LET'S GET IT OVER WITH. THEY MAKE A CUTE COUPLE,DON'T YOU THINK? NOW, WHERE WERE WE? OH, I CAN'T REMEMBEREXACTLY. SOMETHING ABOUT YOU FINDING MEINCREDIBLY EXCITING. YOU KNOW, ALEX, I'VE ADMIRED YOUFROM AFAR FOR A LONG TIME. WELL, NOW YOU CAN ADMIRE MEFROM A-CLOSE. OKAY, EVERYONE. OKAY. THIS IS THE MOMENTWE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR. IT'S TIME TO ANNOUNCETHE LUCKY NEW MEMBERS OF PI NU! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] CONGRATULATIONS,KAREN SHELDON... [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ...DONNA BALDWIN... [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ...ANNETTE MARILLA... [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ...AND KATIE BREWSTER! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] WELCOME TO OUR LITTLE FAMILY. EXCUSE ME. ARE YOU SURE YOU DIDN'T MISSANY NAMES ON THAT LIST? NO, THAT'S ALL. UM, MY NAME'SMALLORY KEATON. CAN YOU CHECKONE MORE TIME? [ SIGHS ] I DON'T SEE YOUR NAMEON HERE ANYWHERE. I DON'T THINKIT WAS SUBMITTED. I DON'T UNDERSTAND. COME ON, ALEX.LET'S GO HOME. ALEX, LET'S GO. MALLORY, DO YOU MIND? ALEX, MY NAMEWAS NOT ON THE LIST TO PLEDGE THE SORORITY. OH, WHAT ARE YOUTALKING ABOUT? SHERRY, WASN'T MALLORY'S NAMEON THE LIST? I DON'T KNOW. I'M NOTON THE MEMBERSHIP COMMITTEE. W-WELL, I THOUGHTYOU SAID YOU WERE GONNA -- WELL, MAL,THESE THINGS HAPPEN. I MEAN, OBVIOUSLY,SHERRY DID ALL SHE COULD. ALEX,I WANT TO GO HOME NOW. SORRY.I-I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL. I'LL SEE YOU THERE. YOU'RE NOT COMING WITH ME? I HAVE RESPONSIBILITIES,MALLORY. I'M NEEDED HERE. MALLORY... I'LL TAKE YOU HOME. MALLORY! HI, DAD. WHY ARE YOU SITTING HEREIN THE DARK? I WAS JUST THINKING. WHAT'S THAT? OH, THIS IS YOUR, UH,SCIENCE PROJECT. I COULDN'T SLEEP, SO I THOUGHTI'D WORK ON IT A LITTLE. HOW AM I DOING ON IT? I'LL BE HONEST, MAL --YOU'RE HAVING TROUBLE. AT THIS POINT, IT'S A "B"OR A B-PLUS, AT BEST. WELL, DAD, WHAT'S IMPORTANTIS NOT THE GRADE BUT WHAT YOU LEARNFROM IT. HOW WAS THE DANCE? IT'S TERRIBLE. I WASN'T EVEN INVITEDINTO THE SORORITY. HONEY,W-W-WHAT HAPPENED? DO YOU WANT TO TALKABOUT IT? WHAT HAPPENED IS THATSHERRY NEVER EVEN PUTMY NAME ON THE LIST. I MEAN, SHE GOT WHAT SHE WANTED,THEN FORGOT ALL ABOUT ME. OH, MAL, I'M SORRY. HOW COULD I BESO STUPID? SHERRY WAS JUST USING ME. LOOK,THIS MAY BE HARD TO FACE, BUT, UH,WEREN'T YOU USING HER, TOO? THAT'S DIFFERENT. HOW? IT WORKED FOR HER. THOUGHT I HEARDVOICES. HOW WAS THE PARTY? JENNIFER,YOUR BROTHER IS A JERK. I KNOW THAT.HOW WAS THE PARTY? YOU DIDN'T GET IN,DID YOU? NOPE. I'M SORRY, HONEY. FORGET THEM, MALLORY. WE DON'T NEEDTHOSE STINKY P.U.s, ANYWAY. PI NUS. SAME THING. HOW COULD SHERRYUSE ME LIKE THAT? AND ALEX KNEW SHE USED ME, AND HE STILL STAYED THEREWITH HER. WELL, WE HAVEN'T HEARDALEX'S SIDE OF THE STORY. WELL, WHAT COULD HE SAY? "I'M SORRYSHERRY RUINED YOUR LIFE, BUT I THINK SHE'S CUTE"? YEAH, HE COULD SAY THAT. I CAN DEFINITELYPICTURE ALEX SAYING THAT. [ KNOCK ON WINDOW ] I NEVER GOT MY SLOW DANCE! THE PARTY'S OVER,SKIPPY! AREN'T YOU AFRAIDYOU'RE SPOILING HIM? IT'S JUST SKIPPY. YOU KNOW, MALLORY, FOR SOMEONEWHO WAS TREATED RUDELY TONIGHT, YOU HAVEN'T LEARNEDANY LESSONS FROM IT. WHAT DO YOU MEAN? IT'S A LITTLE DIFFICULTFOR US TO HAVE ANY SYMPATHYFOR THE WAY SHERRY TREATED YOU WITH SKIPPY OUT THEREIN THE SHRUBBERY. ALEX! THOUGHT I SAW A LIGHT ON.[ LAUGHS ] ALEX, YOU HAVE A LOT OF NERVECOMING BACK HOME. MALLORY,JUST HEAR ME OUT. YEAH, I'LL BETALEX TOLD THAT SHERRY OFF. YOU PROBABLY JUST DIDN'TWANT TO WALK OUT ON HER. YOU WERE JUST BEING POLITE,RIGHT, ALEX? RIGHT, ALEX? TALK TO ME, ALEX! CAN I SPEAK TO MALLORYALONE, PLEASE? WELL, YOU GUYS DO HAVESOME THINGS TO WORK OUT. LET'S GO ON UP TO BED. SKIPPY, WHY DON'T YOU GOINTO THE KITCHEN AND MAKE YOURSELFA FEW DOZEN SANDWICHES? OKAY, BUT DON'T GO TO BEDWITHOUT TELLING ME. I HOPE YOU'RE PROUDOF YOURSELF, ALEX. WHAT KIND OF BROTHERARE YOU?! WAIT A MINUTE, MALLORY.LET'S GO BACK A FEW STEPS HERE. YOU'RE THE ONEWHO STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. YOU WANTED METO GO OUT WITH SHERRY. YOU WANTED METO LIKE HER. YEAH, BUT YOU WERESUPPOSED TO STOP LIKING HER ONCE I DIDN'TGET INTO PI NU. I'M SORRY -- I SHOULD HAVEREAD MY RULE BOOK ON TRICKERY AND MANIPULATIONIN TEENAGE DATING. OHH. NO. DON'T PLAY MARTYRWITH ME, ALEX. YOU USED ME TO GET OUT OF YOUR BET WITH SKIPPY. I USED YOU? YOU USED ME FIRSTTO GO OUT WITH SHERRY TO GET YOU INTO PI NU. THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE SHERRY WASUSING ME TO GET TO YOU. EXACTLY. SHERRY USED ME. YOU USED ME. I'M THE ONLY ONEWHO GOT USED TWICE. AND I WASN'T EVEN TRYINGTO GET INTO ANYTHING! WELL... ...YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. LISTEN TO US. WE'RE ARGUING OVERWHICH ONE OF US WAS MORE SLEAZY. I THINK YOU WON. [ SIGHS ] LET'S FACE IT. THIS HAS BEENQUITE AN UNSAVORY CHAPTER IN OUR YOUNG LIVES. I GUESS. YOU KNOW,WHEN YOU THINK OF IT, THE ONLY ONE OF USWHO WAS PURE OF MOTIVE AND NOBLE OF HEARTIS THAT YOUNG MAN IN THERE. [ CLATTER ] Skippy: I'M SORRY!I-I'LL CLEAN THAT UP! I DON'T KNOW, ALEX. IT'S LIKE I HADTEMPORARY INSANITY OR SOMETHING. I WANTED TO GET INTOTHAT SORORITY SO BAD THAT NOTHING ELSEMATTERED. EVERYBODY GOES THROUGHA MOMENT OR TWO LIKE THAT IN THEIR LIVES,MALLORY. WHERE WAS MY PRIDE,MY SELF-RESPECT? THEY DIDN'T WANT ME.WHY DID I WANT THEM? THEY DO HAVEGREAT SWEATERS. I'M SORRY, ALEX.I REALLY OWE YOU AN APOLOGY. WELL, IT'S POSSIBLETHAT MY BEHAVIOR HAS NOT EXACTLYBEEN ABOVE REPROACH. I OWE YOU AN APOLOGY,TOO. ACCEPTED. YOU KNOW, IF IT MAKES YOUFEEL ANY BETTER, I TOLD SHERRY THAT IF YOUWEREN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR HER, SHE WASN'T GOOD ENOUGHFOR ME. I'M NOT GONNA BESEEING HER ANYMORE. [ CAR HORN HONKS ] THAT'S FOR ME. BUT YOU JUST SAID -- YEAH, WELL,THAT'S NOT SHERRY. THAT'S LISA.SHE'S THE SERGEANT AT ARMS. SHE'S NOT LIKETHOSE OTHER GIRLS. YOU'D REALLY LIKE HER. I'LL BET. WHY DON'T YOU GO ON UPAND GO TO BED? I WILL. I GOT SOMETHINGTO TAKE CARE OF FIRST, THOUGH. WHAT? I OWE SOMEBODY SOMETHING. [ SOFT MUSIC PLAYING ] CAN YOU COME IN HERE, PLEASE? [ MUSIC CONTINUES ] IRWIN,THEY'RE PLAYING OUR SONG.