* I BET WE'VE BEEN TOGETHERFOR A MILLION YEARS * * AND I'LL BETWE'LL BE TOGETHER * * FOR A MILLION MORE * OHH, IT'S LIKEI STARTED BREATHIN' * * ON THE NIGHT WE KISSED * AND I CAN'T REMEMBER * WHAT I EVER DID BEFORE * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * AND THEREAIN'T NO NOTHING * * WE CAN'T LOVEEACH OTHER THROUGH * * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * SHA LA LA LA * HOW MANY TIMES CANA MAN TURN HIS HEAD * * PRETENDINGHE JUST DOESN'T SEE * * PRETENDINGHE JUST DOESN'T SEE * * PRETENDINGHE JUST DOESN'T SEE * * THE ANSWER, MY FRIEND * IS BLOWIN'IN THE WIND * * THE ANSWER IS BLOWIN' IN THE WIND * * THE ANSWER IS BLOWIN' IN THE WIND * BEAUTIFUL. OH, THATWAS GREAT, ELYSE. YOU CERTAINLY HAVEN'TLOST YOUR TOUCH. I'M SO RUSTY.I MUST HAVE PLUCKED20 BAD NOTES. COME ON.NO, YOU DIDN'T. I COUNTED 23. I ONLY COUNTED 19. THAT'S AS HIGHAS YOU CAN COUNT. LISTENING TO YOUREMINDED MEOF THE OLD DAYS. MAKES MEWANT TO GO OUT AND BOYCOTTSOME LETTUCE. DID YOU KNOWSHE WAS A FOLK SINGER? I WASN'T REALLYA FOLK SINGER. OCCASIONALLY,I PICKED UP A GUITAR. DON'T BE SO MODEST. YOUR MOTHER USED TO PERFORMEVERY THURSDAY NIGHT. IT WAS IN A TINY, JAM-PACKED,SMOKE-FILLED COFFEE HOUSE TWO FLOORS UNDERGROUND. THE AGE OF DARKNESS CAFE. SOUNDS LIKEA FUN PLACE. WEDNESDAY WASANARCHIST NIGHT. PEOPLE IN FAVOR OF VIOLENTOVERTHROW OF THE GOVERNMENT GOT A FREE COCKTAIL. HEY, YOU REMEMBERTHAT TIME WE CAME THEREAFTER THE RALLY-- DON'T GET STARTED.WE'VE GOT TO GO. SHE'S GOT A POINT. YOU COULD HAVE MADEA CAREER OUT OF SINGING. WHY DIDN'TYOU PURSUE IT? I HAD A FAMILY TO RAISE,ANOTHER CAREER TO BUILD. SINGING WAS ONLY A HOBBY. I DID HAVEA DECENT FOLLOWING. EVERYBODY THOUGHTYOU'D BE THE NEXTJUDY COLLINS. YOU SING GREAT, MOM. I BET YOU COULD HAVE BEENTHE NEXT JOAN COLLINS. JUDY COLLINS,AND YOUR DAD'S EXAGGERATING. OH, NO, HE ISN'T. YOU WERE REALLYSOMETHING SPECIAL. THE WORLDGAINED AN ARCHITECT, BUT LOSTA GREAT SINGER. MAYBE YOUCOULD HAVECOMBINED THEM AND BEENTHE SINGINGARCHITECT. AH, TO WATCHA GREAT MIND AT WORK. I JUST GOT AN IDEA. ANDY AND IWENT TO A NIGHTCLUB CALLED THE TOP SPOT. IT'S NO AGEOF DARKNESS CAFE, BUT IT WAS FUN. MAYBE WE COULDGO SOMETIME. SOUNDS GOOD. AHEM. WE'VE GOT TO GO. THE TIMEKEEPER. THANK YOU. BYE-BYE. GOOD SEEING YOU. GOOD-BYE. AND YOU, BABY,TIME FOR BED. GOOD NIGHT.YOU WERE GREAT. WILL YOU TUCK ME IN? I'LL TUCK YOU IN. I'M GOINGTO BED EARLY, TOO. ALEX IS GIVING MEA DRIVING LESSON TOMORROW. WE'RE GOING TO WORKON OPENING THE CAR DOOR. ALEX, I WANTTO ACTUALLY DRIVE. LOOK, MALLORY,YOU MAY BE CARRYINGPACKAGES SOMETIME. EVER THINK OF THAT? OPENING THE CAR DOORIS NOT ALWAYS EASY. HMM. HMM. THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. IT'S A PLEASURETO BE HERE TONIGHT. AH, YOU'REA BEAUTIFUL AUDIENCE. I'D LIKE TO SING FOR YOU A SONGTHAT'S VERY SPECIAL TO ME. A SONG THAT ASKSTHE MUSICAL QUESTION... * WHERE HAVE ALLTHE FLOWERS GONE * THANK YOU. * LONG TIME PASSING THANK YOU VERY MUCH. * WHERE HAVE ALLTHE FLOWERS GONE * JOIN ME. * LONG TIME AGO HI, MAL. HI. HOW DIDTHE DRIVING LESSON GO? GREAT! I THINKI'M A NATURAL-BORN DRIVER. WHERE'S ALEX? HOW DID THE LESSON GO? I THOUGHT I'D NEVERSEE THIS HOUSE AGAIN. OH, ALEX, DON'T BESO MELODRAMATIC. DON'T WORRY. IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT. I ASSUMED THAT WHEN YOUSAW A SIGN MARKED "STOP," YOU'D TAKE ITAT FACE VALUE. I TOLD YOU,I DIDN'T SEE THE SIGN. HOW COULD YOU?YOU WERE GOINGIN REVERSE. IT COULDN'THAVE BEEN THAT BAD. ALEX HAS NO PATIENCE. HE WAS YELLING AT METHE WHOLE TIME. I WASN'T YELLING AT YOU. I WAS YELLING AT A COPTO SHOOT AT OUR TIRES. YOU'RE NOT BEINGVERY HELPFUL, ALEX. MALLORY NEEDS A PATIENT,TOLERANT TEACHER. WILL YOU TAKE METOMORROW, DAD? SURE. I'LL BE GLAD TO. YOU MIGHT NEED THIS. WHAT IS THAT? HI, HONEY.YOU'RE LATE. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? I'M GLAD YOUASKED THAT QUESTION. YOU GOING TO ANSWER? YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS, BUT ON THE WAY HOME, I STOPPED INAT THE TOP SPOT, AND I HAVE AN AUDITIONTOMORROW AFTERNOON! HOLD DOWNTHE ENTHUSIASM A BIT. HONEY, THAT'S GREAT. HOW ARE YOU GOINGTO BE A SINGER? ARE YOU GOINGTO QUIT YOUR JOB? NOBODY'S QUITTINGANY JOBS AROUND HERE. THESE PEOPLEGOT KIDS TO SUPPORT. THEY GOT A BOYTO PUT THROUGH COLLEGE. I'M NOT QUITTING MY JOB. I HAD SUCHA GOOD TIME LAST NIGHT THAT I WAS THINKINGHOW NICE IT WOULD BE TO PERFORM AGAIN. IN FRONT OF PEOPLE? THAT'STHE BASIC IDEA. I THINK YOU'REA GREAT SINGER, BUT YOU'RE OUR MOTHER. I TRY TO KEEPA LOW PROFILE ON THAT. I THOUGHT,WHAT HAVE I GOT TO LOSE? YOUR MOTHER IS VERY BRAVETO TRY THIS. IT'S IMPORTANTTO PURSUE YOUR DREAMS, NO MATTER HOW GREATTHE ODDS AGAINST YOU. LIKE YOU TRYING TO GETA DRIVER'S LICENSE. CORKY, WHY DON'T YOUTRY LISTENING? I'M NOT LISTENINGTO A DUMMY LIKE YOU. HEY, CORKY, I HEAR YOUGOT A NEW GIRLFRIEND. DENNIS,SHE'S THE GREATEST. HER SKIN IS SO SOFT, WHEN I TOUCHED HER,I ONLY GOT THREE SPLINTERS. WHEN I TOUCHED HER,I ONLY GOT THREE SPLINTERS. OK, DENNIS.YOU WERE GREAT. HEY, WHAT ABOUT ME? OH, YOU WERE-- OH, YOU WERE-- YOU GUYS CRACK ME UP. PRETTY SOON YOU'LL KISS THAT DISHWASHING JOBGOOD-BYE. WE GOT IT DOWN.HE WASHES, I DRY. ALL RIGHT. YOU'RETHE OPENING ACT. WE DOTWO SHOWS A NIGHT, $50 A WEEK.CONGRATULATIONS. THANK YOU,UNCLE LOU. THANK YOU,UNCLE LOU. I DON'T KNOW, STEVEN. WHAT IF HEDOESN'T LIKE ME? HE LIKED DENNISAND CORKY, DIDN'T HE? I'M THAT BAD? OF COURSE NOT. I NEVER SEEYOUR LIPS MOVE. EXCUSE ME, SIR. I'M STEVEN KEATON.THIS IS MY WIFE ELYSE. SHE SINGS. WHAT DO YOU DO? I MANAGE A PUBLICBROADCASTING STATION. OK, STEVEN. YOU'LLFOLLOW THE JUGGLER. IT'S A JOKE.COME ON! IT'S A JOKE.COME ON! HE'S HEREFOR MORAL SUPPORT. I'M THE ONEWITH THE AUDITION. ELYSE KEATON,FOLK SINGER. WE'RE READY FOR YOU. UH, UP THERE. THANK YOU, HONEY. THANK YOU, HONEY. GOOD LUCK, HONEY. THANK YOU. THERE'S A LOT OF SUFFERINGIN THE WORLD TODAY. WE TEND TO FORGETABOUT PEOPLE WHO HAVE LESSTHAN WE DO. WE TAKE THINGS FOR GRANTED. WE DON'T REALIZEHOW LUCKY WE ARE. EXCUSE ME. WHY ARE YOUTELLING ME THESE THINGS? IF I WANT TO FEEL GUILTY,I'LL CALL MY MOTHER. I'M SORRY. * TO EVERYTHING * TURN, TURN, TURN * THERE IS A SEASON * TURN, TURN, TURN * AND A TIMEFOR EVERY PURPOSE * * UNDER HEAVEN * A TIME TO BE BORN * A TIME TO DIE THAT'S ENOUGH. WHY DON'T YOU COMEDOWN HERE AND TALK? YOU WERE GREAT, HONEY. DID YOU THINK SO? LOU IS VISIBLY MOVED. SO, HOW DID I DO? YOU DEFINITELYDIDN'T STINK. OH! YOU REALLY MEAN THAT? WELCOMETO SHOW BUSINESS. WHEN DO I START? UH, START SATURDAY. TWO SHOWS A NIGHT,$25 A WEEK. WAIT A MINUTE. YOU'RE PAYINGDENNIS AND CORKY50 A WEEK. OF COURSE.THERE ARE TWO OF THEM. I JUST HAD MY BESTDRIVING LESSON EVER. MAYBE SOON YOU CANTAKE ME TO SCHOOL. SURE! I'LL BE DRIVINGALL OVER TOWN. I EXPLAINEDTO YOU, OFFICER. SHE GOT THE TWO PEDALS CONFUSED. I DIDN'T GETTHE PEDALS CONFUSED. I GOT MY FEET CONFUSED. MALLORY, LET MEHANDLE THIS, PLEASE. SHE VIOLATED ALMOST EVERYTRAFFIC ORDINANCE KNOWN TO MAN. SHE MADE A FEWLITTLE MISTAKES. NOTHING OUTOF THE ORDINARY. DAD... WHAT'S THIS DOINGIN THE FRONT YARD? ALEX, PUT THATBACK, PLEASE. AH, MALLORY'SDRIVING LESSON. I'LL JUST PUT THISWITH THE OTHER STUFF. ALEX. OFFICER, PLEASE. IF YOU COME DOWNHARD ON HER NOW, YOU'LL DESTROYHER CONFIDENCE. I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. JUST THIS ONE TIME,I'LL LET HER GO. BUT, PLEASE,KEEP HER OFF THE STREETS. SHE HAS A LOTOF POTENTIAL. WHAT TIME TOMORROWWILL WE GO DRIVING? MALLORY...YOU'RE MY DAUGHTER, AND I LOVE YOUVERY MUCH, BUT I'M NEVER GETTINGINTO AN AUTOMOBILEWITH YOU AGAIN. DAD! GUYS, I NEED YOUR HELP. WHICH ONE OF THESESHOULD I WEAR TONIGHT? I TOLD YOU,YOU GOT TO GO CASUAL. COULDN'T YOU WEARSOMETHING WITH A VEIL? MALLORY, WHY ARE YOUSO EMBARRASSED ABOUT THIS? YOUR MOTHER'S ALWAYSLOVED TO SING, AND IT'S IMPORTANTFOR HER NOW. WHEN MRS. WEBER HAD A MIDLIFE CRISIS, SHE JUST WENTTO LAW SCHOOL. NANCY HEFNER'S MOM RAN OFFWITH A COLLEGE SOPHOMORE. LET HER SING. I'M NOTGOING THROUGHA MIDLIFE CRISIS. I JUST WANTTO DO SOMETHING THAT I HAVEN'T DONE IN YEARS. MIDLIFE CRISIS. CLASSIC.CLASSIC. CLASSIC.CLASSIC. HAVE YOU CHOSENA STAGE NAME YET? A STAGE NAME? YEAH. SOMETHINGWITH A LITTLE MOREPIZZAZZ THAN KEATON. I WAS THINKINGELYSE LAMOUR. SHE'S A FOLK SINGER,NOT A STRIPPER. HOW ABOUTRAMBLIN' ELYSE LAMOUR? NO, THANKS, ALEX. COME ON, ELYSE,YOU BETTER GET DRESSED. I'M HAVING TROUBLE WITH THIS LAND IS YOUR LAND. CAN YOU SING IT NOW? I COULD SUREUSE THE PRACTICE. LET'S SEE. * THIS LANDIS YOUR LAND * * THIS LAND IS MY LAND * FROM THE REDWOOD FOREST HONEY, I'M SORRY.CALIFORNIA, RIGHT? * CALIFORNIA SHOOT. START AGAIN.PICK IT UP A LITTLE. * THIS LAND IS YOUR LAND * THIS LAND IS MY LAND * FROM CALIFORNIA * TO THE NEW YORK ISLAND * FROM THE REDWOOD FOREST * TO THE GULFSTREAM WATERS * * THIS LAND WAS MADEFOR YOU AND ME * EVERYBODY! * AS I WAS WALKING * THAT RIBBON OF HIGHWAY * I SAW ABOVE ME MOM, MAYBE YOU SHOULDPLAY SOME MODERN SONGS. SONGS LIKE BEAT IT OR MURDER BY NUMBERS. DA DO DO DO DA DA DA DA. AH, THOSE OLD STANDARDS. AMAZINGLY ENOUGH, MALLORYMAY HAVE A POINT. YOU SHOULD BE READYWITH ONE OF THOSE SONGS. HOW DOES ONE GO? * BEAT IT, BEAT IT * BEAT IT, BEAT IT * NO ONE LIKESTO BE DEFEATED * * SHOW ME WHAT'S FUNKY * SHOW MEWHAT'S RIGHT * * IT DOESN'T-- I LIKED IT. MY FATHER USED TO CALL MEBY MY BIBLICAL NAME... I'LL START WITH THIS LAND, THEN BLOWING IN-- NO, NO. BLOWING FIRST-- DO IT LIKE YOUREHEARSED IT. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS,KNOTHEAD. VENTRILOQUIST ACTSARE RARE NOWADAYS. RIGHT. LOTS OF DUMMIESARE OUT OF WORK. YOU COULD BE NEXT. HEY, PAL, YOU'REMOVING YOUR LIPS. I'LL STOP IF YOU WILL. GOOD NIGHT. DON'T FORGET.CONSERVE FIREWOOD. THE LOG YOU SAVEMAY BE MY UNCLE. GOOD NIGHT! DENNIS McKAY AND CORKY.LET'S HEAR IT FOR THEM. A LITTLE LADY CAMEINTO OUR WEDNESDAY AUDITION AND REALLY KNOCKED USFOR A LOOP AND A HALF. SO PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER. LET'S HAVE A WARMTOP SPOT WELCOME FOR MISS ELYSE KEATON! COME ON UP HERE. MY NAME IS ELYSE KEATON. I'M A SINGER. ACTUALLY, I'M AN ARCHITECT, BUT I CAN'T VERY WELLDRAW PICTURES OF HOUSES FOR YOU, CAN I? UM... I'D LIKE TO DEDICATETHIS FIRST SET TO A MAN WHO CHANGEDTHE COURSE OF MY LIFE-- A MAN NAMED WOODY GUTHRIE. A MAN NAMED WOODY GUTHRIE. * THIS LAND IS YOUR LAND * THIS LANDIS MY LAND * * FROM CALIFORNIA OH, GOD. MAN, GET REAL. * FROM THE REDWOOD FOREST * TO THE GULFSTREAM WATERS * LICENSE NUMBER XJ473, PLEASE SEE EDMUNDO. THANK YOU. * AS I WAS WALKIN' * THAT RIBBON OF HIGHWAY * THIS LAND WAS MADEFOR YOU AND ME * UH, THAT SONG HADA LOT OF MEANING FOR ME, BUT, UM...I'M JUST ONE PERSON. MAYBE WE'LL TRYSOMETHING ELSE. * KUMBAYA, MY LORD * KUMBAYA * KUMBAYA, MY LORD * KUMBAYA * KUMBAYA * KUMBAYA, MY LORD * KUMBAYA BETTER KEEPYOUR DAY JOB, LADY. * OH, LORD, KUMBAYA * OH, LORD, KUMBAYA CHECK, CHECK. MAYBE YOU'LL LIKETHIS ONE BETTER. * BEAT IT * BEAT IT * NO ONE WANTSTO BE DEFEATED * WHOO! * SHOW ME... SORRY. ELYSE, DARLING, COME ON. PLEASE. TAKE ME HOME, PLEASE. SIT DOWN. RELAX. HONEY, YOU'RE UPSET. I WAS HORRIBLE. ISN'T THAT FUNNY?I THOUGHT YOU WERE GREAT. YOU SANG BEAUTIFULLY,ELYSE. REALLY, MOM. THE CROWD WASN'TREADY FOR YOU. THEY WERE TOOCONSERVATIVE. YOU'RE VERY KIND,BUT I WASN'T ANY GOOD. I WAS RUSTY.I SHOULD'VE REHEARSED MORE. I JUST DIDN'T SING WELL. MRS. KEATON, I THOUGHT YOUWERE WONDERFUL MYSELF. GREAT VOCAL ABILITY. IT'S YOUR MATERIAL, HONEY.THAT'S ALL. MIND YOUR OWNBUSINESS, CORKY. NO. LET HIM SPEAK. WELL, IT'S THOSE SONGSYOU'RE SINGING. IT'S NOT WHAT EVERYONE TODAYWANTS TO HEAR. THEY HAVE TOO MUCH MEANING. SURE, YOU AND ICAN RELATE TO THEM, BUT WHAT ABOUT GUYSLIKE DENNIS HERE? I ADMIT ICOULDN'T FOLLOW IT. BUT THOSE ARE THE SONGSI WANT TO SING. THEN SINGFOR YOUR OWN PLEASURE. YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF,THEY'LL BELIEVE IN YOU. CORKY MAKESAN EXCELLENT POINT, ELYSE. THANKS, STEVE. LET'S HAVE LUNCH. ELYSE. DON'T TRY TO TALK MEINTO GOING BACK OUT THERE. THAT WASSO HORRIBLE, SO FRIGHTENING. I SHOULD NEVERHAVE DONE ITIN THE FIRST PLACE. IT ALL CAME BACKWITH A RUSH, ELYSE. WHAT DID? SITTING IN CLUBSLIKE THIS, WATCHING YOU UP THERE, LISTENING TO YOU SING. CHEERING YOU ON,HOPING YOU'D SING ANOTHER. LOVING YOUR VOICE. LOVING YOU. I LOVED YOU SO MUCH THEN, STEVEN. I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE NOW, BUT THAT--THAT'SSEPARATE FROM THIS. I MADE A MISTAKE. YOU CAN'TGO HOME AGAIN. I WAS SUCH A JERK. I WAS OUT THERE TRYING TO RECAPTURESOMETHING THAT'S OVER. I'M TOO OLDFOR THIS, YOU KNOW? IT HAD ITS TIME,AND SO DID I. I MADE SUCH A FOOLOUT OF MYSELF. LOOK. THERE'S ANOTHERAUDIENCE AT 10:00. THEY DON'T KNOWWHAT A FOOL YOUMADE OF YOURSELF. I PROMISENOT TO TELL THEM. LIKE CORKY SAID,DO IT FOR YOURSELF, FOR YOUROWN PLEASURE. YOU CAN GOHOME AGAIN, ELYSE. YOU MAY NOT LIKEWHAT'S HAPPENEDTO THE NEIGHBORHOOD. DO IT, ELYSE. YOU WON'T BE ALONE. YOUR BEST FRIENDWILL BE WITH YOU. AS YOU CAN SEE,HE CANNOT SEE A THING. NOT A THING. NOTHING! HOW MANY FINGERSAM I HOLDING UP? UH, TWO. THE AMAZING CORKY!HOW DOES HE DO IT? THANK YOU,AND GOOD NIGHT. DENNIS McKAY AND CORKY.LET'S HEAR IT FOR THEM. I'D LIKETO INTRODUCE A LADY WHO DEBUTED HERETHIS EVENING. FOR HER SECOND DEBUT,MISS ELYSE KEATON! ALL RIGHT! YAY! YAY!YAY, MOM! THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I HAVEN'T STEPPED ON-STAGETO SING IN ALMOST 20 YEARS-- IN THE SIXTIES. ANYONE OUT THEREREMEMBER THE SIXTIES? YAY! WE TRIED TO BAN THE BOMBAND BEAUTIFY AMERICA, AND WE SANG SONGS. FOLK SONGS,SONGS OF SOCIAL PROTEST. I'M GOING TO SING A FEWOF THOSE FOR YOU TONIGHT. WE'LL SEE HOW IT GOES. I'D LIKE TODEDICATE THIS FIRST SET TO A MAN WHO CHANGEDTHE COURSE OF MY LIFE-- A MAN NAMED STEVEN KEATON. * COME GATHER 'ROUND,PEOPLE * * WHEREVER YOU ROAM * AND ADMIT * THAT THE WATERSAROUND YOU HAVE GROWN * * AND ACCEPTTHAT QUITE SOON * * YOU'LL BE DRENCHEDTO THE BONE * * TIME TO YOUIS WORTH SAVIN' * * BETTER START SWIMMIN' * OR YOU'LL SINKLIKE A STONE * * FOR THE TIMES * THEY ARE A-CHANGIN' * COME WRITERSAND CRITICS * * PROPHESIZE WITH YOUR PEN * AND KEEP YOUR EYES WIDE * THE CHANCEWON'T COME AGAIN * * DON'T SPEAK TOO SOON * THE WHEEL'SSTILL IN SPIN * * AND THERE'S NO TELLIN'WHO THAT IT'S NAMIN' * * FOR THE LOSER NOW * WILL LATER, TOO, WIN * FOR THE TIMES * THEY ARE A-CHANGIN' CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BYPARAMOUNT PICTURES CORPORATION CAPTIONING PERFORMED BYTHE NATIONAL CAPTIONINGINSTITUTE, INC.