-[ HUMMING ]-WELL, THAT WASA WASTE OF TWO HOURS. I CAN'T BELIEVETHAT YOUR MOTHER AND I ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO ENJOYED"A HARD DAY'S NIGHT." NO, NOW, I THINK THERE WERESOME OTHER OLD PEOPLE IN THE AUDIENCEWHO ENJOYED IT, TOO. YEAH, I HEAR BEATLES ARE BIGIN NURSING HOMES. NEXT TIME,LET ME PICK THE MOVIE, OKAY? UH, NO, WE LET YOU PICKTHE MOVIE LAST TIME,AND IT WAS TERRIBLE. I CAN'T HELP ITIF YOU DON'T LIKE SUBTITLES. AT LEAST THAT MOVIE WAS QUIET.YOU COULD SLEEP. THESE GUYS KEPT BREAKINGINTO SONG EVERY FIVE MINUTES. ELYSE, I'M CRUSHED. HOW DID WE RAISETHREE CHILDREN WHO DON'T CARE THAT ELEANOR RIGBY KEEPSHER FACE IN A JAR BY THE DOOR? THE SAME WAYOUR PARENTS RAISED KIDS WHO DON'T CAREHOW STELLA LOOKED BY STARLIGHT. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GUYSUSED TO LISTEN TO THAT MUSIC. IT WAS SO BORING. THEY DIDN'T EVENBREAK ANY GUITARS. HEY, IS THAT HOW YOU JUDGEMUSIC TODAY -- BY HOW MANY GUITARSGET BROKEN? NO, THAT'S HOW YOU KNOWWHEN THE SONG IS OVER. AH. STEVEN! COME IN HERE QUICKLY! -HONEY, WHAT?-WHAT'S GOING ON? MY GOD. WE'VE BEEN ROBBED. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! PEOPLE WE DON'T EVEN KNOWCAME IN HERE. THEY TRACKED MUDALL OVER THE FLOOR. THEY TOOK THINGSTHAT BELONG TO US! WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT? THEY'RE BURGLARS, ELYSE.THAT'S THEIR JOB. -I'M GONNA CHECK MY ROOM.-ME TOO. STEVEN, CHECK THE DINING ROOM. SEE IF THE SILVERWARE'SSTILL THERE. IT'S IN THE TOP DRAWEROF THE BREAKFRONT. WOW, WAIT UNTILMY CLASS HEARS ABOUT THIS DURING SHOW-AND-TELL. OH, MOMMY. WOULD YOU MIND ME TYING YOUTO THIS CHAIR FOR A PICTURE? THE KIDS AT SCHOOLARE HARD TO IMPRESS. I THINK THE SILVER'S GONE,ELYSE. IT'S NOT IN THE BREAKFRONT? HARD TO TELL.THEY TOOK THE BREAKFRONT. THEY CLEANED ME OUT.T-THEY TOOK EVERYTHING. THEY TOOKMY CALCULATOR COLLECTION. THEY TOOK MY GOLF CLUBS. AT LEAST THEY DIDN'T TOUCHMY MANTOVANI ALBUMS. THAT'S A RELIEF. BUT THEY REALLYMADE A MESS UP THERE. THEY WENT THROUGH EVERYTHING,EVEN THE LINEN CLOSET. OH, GREAT! NOW THE ENTIREUNDERWORLD KNOWS THAT MY SHEETS AND PILLOWCASESDON'T MATCH. IT'S GONE! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! THEY TOOKMY MOST PRIZED POSSESSION! SO WE'LL GET YOUANOTHER MIRROR. NO, THEY TOOK MY DIARY!I'M FREAKING OUT. I'M GONNA HAVE TO LEAVE TOWN. DON'T WORRY, MALLORY.I HAD IT XEROXED LAST WEEK. YOU XEROXED MY DIARY? YEAH, AND I HAVEA LOT OF QUESTIONS. I'M GONNA KILL YOU! I'M CALLING THE POLICE. MA, IT'S JUSTA FIGURE OF SPEECH. NOW, EVERYBODY, STAY CALM. THE IMPORTANT THINGIS THAT NOBODY WAS HURT. NOTHING ELSE MATTERS. THAT'S EASY FOR YOU TO SAY.YOU DIDN'T READ HER DIARY. [ THEME SONG PLAYS ] * I BET WE'VE BEEN TOGETHERFOR A MILLION YEARS * * AND I'LL BET WE'LL BE TOGETHERFOR A MILLION MORE * * OH, IT'S LIKEI STARTED BREATHING * * ON THE NIGHT WE KISSED * WHEN I CAN'T REMEMBERWHAT I EVER DID BEFORE * * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * AND THEREAIN'T NO NOTHIN' * * WE CAN'T LOVEEACH OTHER THROUGH * * OOH * WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY * WITHOUT US? * SHA-LA-LA-LA [ CLACK ]AH! OH. [ INDISTINCT SHOUTING ]I'M ALL RIGHT. I'M ALL RIGHT. I'M ALL RIGHT. I THINKTHE BROOM'S DEAD, THOUGH. JUST RELAX, DAD, OKAY?I'LL CHECK THE LIVING ROOM. AAH! IT'S ALL CLEAR.NOBODY THERE. -DID YOU LOOK UPSTAIRS?-UPSTAIRS? YEAH, YOU KNOW,WHERE WE KEEP THE BEDROOMS. UM, NO, NO.I-I DIDN'T MAKE IT UP THERE. -COWARD.-LOOK WHO'S TALKING -- THE BRAVE SOULWHO OFFERED ME $5 TO CHECK BEHINDTHE SHOWER CURTAIN LAST NIGHT. I DID NOT. I OFFERED YOU $3. YOU SAID YOU'D DO IT FOR $5. MALLORY, IF YOU'RE SCARED,COME TO ME OR DADDY. WE DON'T CHARGE. I WOULD HAVE,BUT YOU WERE DOWNSTAIRS FRISKING THE PAPERBOY. I WASN'T FRISKING HIM.I WAS CHECKING HIS I.D. HE'S NEW ON THE ROUTE. ALL RIGHT, LOOK --THIS IS GOING TO HAVE TO STOP. I WILL NOT HAVE MY FAMILYAFRAID IN OUR OWN HOME. CAN WE GO TO A MOTEL? NO. I-I THINK IT'S TIMEFOR A FAMILY MEETING ABOUT THIS. -[ GROANING ]-YEAH. -NOT ANOTHER FAMILY MEETING.-COME ON. LOOK, CAN'T WE JUSTTALK ABOUT THIS WITHOUT HAVINGA FORMAL MEETING? JUST BECAUSE YOU TWOWANT TO KEEP UP THIS CHARADE OF A '60sPARTICIPATORY DEMOCRACY, WHY DO WE HAVE TO BESUBJECTED TO IT? -YEAH.-YEAH. BECAUSE WE SAY SO. -OKAY.-OKAY. -ASSIGNED SEATS?-ASSIGNED SEATS. ALL RIGHT. THIS MEETINGWILL NOW COME TO ORDER. UH, W-WE'LL DISPENSEWITH THE MINUTES. ANY OLD BUSINESS? AT THE LAST MEETING, WE DECIDED TO BOYCOTTTHE FOLLOWING PRODUCTS -- PERSIAN RUGS, WHALE BLUBBER -- HEY, CAN'T WE JUST SKIPTHE OLD BUSINESS AND GET ON TO THE PROBLEMAT HAND? IT'S HIGHLY IRREGULAR. OH, OKAY. OKAY, LOOK. I KNOW THE BURGLARY'SBEEN HARD ON EVERYONE, BUT WE'VE GOT TO PUT ITPAST US. WE CAN'T LET FEAR TAKE OVERAND DESTROY OUR LIVES. DOES THAT MEAN I HAVE TO STOPSLEEPING WITH MY LIGHT ON? NO, NO, YOU KEEP YOUR LIGHT ONAS LONG AS YOU NEED TO IF IT MAKES YOU FEELMORE COMFORTABLE. CAN ALEX KEEP HIS ON, TOO? JENNIFER. YOU TOLD ME TO ASK. I EXPLAINED THAT TO YOU. I-I NEED THE LIGHT TO READ BY. YOU READBY A DONALD DUCK NIGHTLIGHT? AH! ALL -- ALL --ALL I'M SAYING -- ALL I'M SAYING IS, WE'REGOING TO TAKE SOME STEPS TO TRY AND HELP USFEEL SAFE AGAIN. YEAH, I THINK WE SHOULD KEEPTHE HOUSE LOCKED AT ALL TIMES. AND DON'TLET ANY STRANGERS IN. AND IF YOU SEE ANYBODY ACTINGSUSPICIOUS, CALL THE POLICE. WE WANT TO KNOWWHERE YOU ARE AND WHO YOU'RE WITHAT ALL TIMES. A-AT ALL TIMES? ALL TIMES. WELL, AS A MEMBEROF THIS DEMOCRATIC HOUSEHOLD, I MOVE WE HOLD A VOTEON THE LAST ISSUE. MOTION DENIED.[ BANGS LADLE ] DO YOU REMEMBER LAST WINTER WHEN WE ALL CAME DOWNWITH THE COLDS AT THE SAME TIME? YEAH, DAD TRIED TO RATIONTISSUES TO SAVE TREES. YEAH, WELL,I THINK GETTING ROBBED IS A LOT LIKE HAVING A COLD. YOU DON'T GET OVER ITALL AT ONCE. IT TAKES A WHILE. WELL, WE'VE ALLBEEN THROUGH THIS TOGETHER. I-I THINK THATWE CAN HELP EACH OTHER OUT. WELL, EVER SINCETHE ROBBERY, I CAN'T HELPFEELING REAL WEIRD. MM-HMM. THAT'S BECAUSEYOU ARE REAL WEIRD. NO, NOW, EVERY TIMEI GO INTO MY BEDROOM, I FEEL LIKE THERE'SA STRANGER WATCHING ME. THAT'S PROBABLY MARTY OBECKACROSS THE STREET. -LOOK, ALEX, JUST BECAUSE ---ALL RIGHT, LOOK. I KNOW YOU'RE ON EDGE, BUT LET'STRY AND STICK TOGETHER HERE. WHAT DO YOU THINKABOUT ORGANIZING A NEIGHBORHOOD-WATCHMEETING, ELYSE? BOY, DAD, YOU'LL DO ANYTHINGTO HOLD A MEETING. THE POLICE SAID THEY WOULD SENDSOMEONE TO SPEAK IF WE DID. -I THINK IT'S A REAL GOOD IDEA.-SHOULD WE HOLD IT HERE? OR MAYBE WE SHOULD CALLPHYLLIS AND HAVE IT OVER -- CHRISSY'S PARENTS HADA NEIGHBORHOOD-WATCH MEETING, AND EVERY HOUSE ON THE BLOCKGOT ROBBED THAT NIGHT EXCEPT THEIRS. WE'LL HAVE IT HERE. [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ] JUST REMEMBER,NOTHING'S FOOLPROOF. IF BURGLARS WANT TO GET INBADLY ENOUGH, THEY WILL. THE MOST YOU CAN DOIS MAKE IT HARD FOR THEM. AND THEN MAYBE THEY'LLGO DOWN THE BLOCK INSTEAD, TO YOUR NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE. [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ] OFFICER. OFFICER. NOW THAT YOU'VE LOST CONTROLOF THIS MEETING, DO YOU MINDIF I SAY SOMETHING? I HAVE A FEELINGYOU'RE GOING TO. THANK YOU. MY NAME IS EARL QUIGLEY.I SELL INSURANCE. THIS SHOULD BEREAL SUBTLE AND SENSITIVE. IF ANYBODY KNOWSHOW VULNERABLE A HOUSE CAN BE, IT'S YOURS TRULY. BELIEVE ME, THERE ISN'TAN ALARM SYSTEM ON THIS EARTH THAT CAN'T BE SUCKERED. DO YOU WANT STATISTICS?I GOT STATISTICS. PICK A CRIME, ANY CRIME. OKAY, UM,ASSAULT AND BATTERY. ONE OF MY FAVORITES. UP 20% IN THIS NEIGHBORHOODOVER THE LAST YEAR. [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ]I'LL TELL YOU FOLKS. WE LIVE IN A JUNGLE. AT THIS VERY MOMENT, THERE'S A CRIME BEING COMMITTEDSOMEWHERE IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD WITHIN A FIVE-MILE RADIUS. YOU WOULDN'T HAPPENTO KNOW WHERE, WOULD YOU? LET'S FACE IT --THE ONLY WAY TO REALLY PROTECT OURSELVESIS TO GET A...G-U-N. [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ] NOW, I WOULDN'T RECOMMEND THATFOR MOST PEOPLE. ACCIDENTS HAPPEN. IF YOU'VE GOT A GUN,YOU'D BETTER BE CAREFUL. I AM. WELL, I GOT TO BE MOVING ON. I HOPE I HAVEN'T MADE YOU PEOPLE ANY MORE FRIGHTENEDTHAN YOU ALREADY WERE. WELL, WE APPRECIATEYOUR HONESTY. BURGLARS ARE A PECULIAR BREED. THEY'RE NOT USUALLY SATISFIED TO HIT ONE HOUSE ON THE BLOCKAND THEN MOVE ON. OH, NO. THEY'LL KEEP COMING BACKAGAIN AND AGAIN, PICKING ON A NEIGHBORHOOD --PICK, PICK, PICK -- TILL THERE'S NOTHING LEFTTO PICK ON -- LEECHES SAPPING OUR STRENGTH,OUR BLOOD. [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ] DID I SAY THE WRONG THING? WHICH TIME? LET'S REMEMBER TO KEEP HIM OUTOF THE LOCKER ROOM AT HALFTIME. CAN I HELP YOU CLEAN UP HEREA LITTLE BIT, ELYSE? THANKS, PHYLLIS. I THINK I'LL JUST LEAVEIT ALL OUT FOR THE BURGLARS. WELL, I CAN'T SAYTHIS MEETING DID A WHOLE LOT FOR MY SENSE OF SECURITY. YOU WANT SECURITY, KEATON?GET YOURSELF A G-U-N. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.WE DON'T BELIEVE IN GUNS. OH, THAT'S FINE AND DANDY UNTIL YOU COME UPAGAINST SOMEBODY WHO DOES. I GOT TO BE GOING. OH, DO YOU HAVE TO? IS THAT THE LOCKYOU'RE GOING WITH, KEATON? [ LAUGHS ] WHY CAN'T HE UNDERSTAND THAT WE CAN'T HAVEA GUN IN THE HOUSE? WE'VE GOT THREE CHILDREN. I'VE GOT FOUR,AND I'VE GOT A GUN. YOU, PHYLLIS? YES, ME. HEY, YOU'D BE SURPRISED HOW MANY PEOPLE LIKE YOU AND MEHAVE GUNS THESE DAYS. I'D THINK ABOUT ITIF I WERE YOU. I'LL CALL YOU TOMORROW, OKAY? YEAH, SURE. -GOOD NIGHT, STEVEN.-UH, G-GOOD NIGHT, PHYLLIS. GEEZ. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.PHYLLIS EVANS HAS GOT A GUN. WHAT IS GOING ONIN THIS WORLD, STEVEN?! STEVEN? HMM? OH, OH, OH, YEAH. UH... LOOK -- I-I DIDN'T LIKETHE WAY THEY PUT IT, BUT, UH, WELL,I HATE TO ADMIT IT, BUT MAYBE SOME OF WHATEARL AND PHYLLIS HAD TO SAY MADE SOME SENSE. MAYBE WE SHOULD AT LEAST CONSIDER BUYING A -- A G-U... YOU KNOW. YOU CAN'T EVEN SAY IT. MY VOCAL CORDSCAN BE VERY STUBBORN. IT TOOK THEM SIX MONTHSTO SAY "PRESIDENT N-NIXON." US? A GUN?THAT SEEMS SO TERRIBLY WRONG. I-I KNOW. I KNOW. I ALSO KNOWTHE WORLD IS CHANGING AND WE'VE GOT TO ADJUSTTO IT. LAST TIME YOU SAID THAT, YOUSIGNED US UP FOR DISCO LESSONS. EVER SINCE -- EVER SINCE THE BURGLARY, I CAN'T STOP MYSELFFROM THINKING ABOUT WHAT MIGHT HAVE HAPPENED IF WE'D BEEN HOMEWHEN THEY BROKE IN. I KNOW THAT THOUGHTCROSSED MY MIND, TOO, THREE OR FOUR HUNDRED TIMES,BUT I-IS A GUN THE ANSWER? I DON'T KNOW. WILL YOU SLEEP DOWN HEREWITH US? WHAT'S THE MATTER? WE'RE SCARED. I MEAN, UM, THEY'RE SCARED.I'M TRYING TO BE SUPPORTIVE. [ CHUCKLES ]SURE, SURE. WHY DON'T WE ALL SLEEPDOWN HERE? IT'LL BE FUN --JUST LIKE CAMPING. AM I GONNA HAVE TO GOTO THE BATHROOM OUTSIDE? NOT THIS TRIP. YOU KIDS WAIT DOWN HERE. YOUR MOTHER AND I WILL CHANGE INTO OUR PAJAMASAND BE RIGHT BACK. YEAH. WE WILL BE RIGHT BACK DOWN. OKAY, COME ON. I DON'T KNOW.I THINK THIS IS A MISTAKE. NOW, WE'RE -- WE'RE JUST HERETO LOOK AT GUNS, ELYSE. WE DON'T HAVE TO BUY ONE. AND IF IT FEELSLIKE A MISTAKE, WE WON'T. OKAY. THERE'S THE GUN DEPARTMENTOVER HERE. OH, LOOK, THERE'S A SALEON LONG UNDERWEAR. MAYBE WE SHOULD STOCK UPFOR THE KIDS. ELYSE, WE ARE QUITE POSSIBLYABOUT TO TAKE A MAJOR STEP IN OUR LIVESTHAT INVOLVES THE SECURITY, THE SAFETY, ANDTHE WELL-BEING OF OUR FAMILY. SO DOES UNDERWEAR. ELYSE. IT'S 25% OFF. I'M COMING. UH, HI. WELL, WHAT CAN I DOFOR YOU FOLKS TODAY? W-W-W-WELL -- WELL, LET'S SEE.UM...OH, WE, UH -- UH, WE NEEDSOME CAMPING ITEMS -- SOME, UH, INSECT REPELLANT,A COMPASS, A COLLAPSIBLE DRINKING CUP, [ Muffled ]A GUN, [ Normal voice ]A CANTEEN, ELECTRIC SOCKS -- OKAY, SUPPOSEWE CUT THE SONG AND DANCE. WHAT KIND OF GUN DO YOU WANT? UH...WELL, UH...WHAT ARE THE DIFFERENT KINDS? DEPENDS. YOU JUST WANT TO PUTA NICK IN HIM, OR DO YOU WANTTO BLOW HIM AWAY? WELL, UH, A NICK, I THINK. WHAT DO YOU THINK, HONEY? A NICK SOUNDS FINE. YES, A NICK, THEN. YOU WANT THAT TO BEA SMALL NICK, MIDDLE-SIZED,OR THE GRAND CANYON? UH, TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, WE'RE NOT ALL THAT SURETHAT WE WANT TO BUY A GUN. YOU SEE, ACTUALLY,WE'RE PACIFISTS. WE'VE MARCHED FOR PEACE SEVEN --OH, NO, EIGHT TIMES, IF YOU COUNT THAT RALLY IN PARISTHAT WE THOUGHT WAS FOR PEACE BUT REALLY IT TURNED OUTTO BE TO LEGALIZE PROSTITUTION. OUR FRENCH WASN'T VERY GOODAT THE TIME. WHEN WERE YOU ROBBED? HOW DID YOU KNOWWE WERE ROBBED? WELL, THAT'S WHAT USUALLYGETS FOLKS LIKE YOU IN HERE. NOW, DON'T BE ASHAMED. IT'S NO CRIME TO WANTTO PROTECT YOURSELVES. WE JUST NEVER THOUGHTWE'D BUY A GUN. WELL, I THINKTHIS MIGHT BE YOUR STYLE. MOST OF THE PACIFISTS WHOCOME IN HERE SEEM TO LIKE IT. [ Normal voice ]WELL, I-I-I NEVER -- I NEVER H-HELD A GUN BEFORE. THIS IS, UH, UH,GOING TO TAKE A MINUTE. OH! IT'S YOU! THEY ARE INTIMIDATING,AREN'T THEY? THAT'S WHAT MAKES THEMSO POPULAR. WHAT DO YOU THINK? [ SIGHS ] I DON'T KNOW. PART OF ME WANTS TO,AND PART OF ME DOESN'T. WHICH PART HAS THE WALLET? STEVEN, DO YOU REALIZE I HOLD IN MY HANDTHE POWER TO TAKE A HUMAN LIFE? WHAT YOU'RE HOLDINGIS THE POWER TO SAVE A LIFE. PUT IT DOWN, ANYWAY. HONEY, I-IF SOMEBODYBROKE INTO THE HOUSE RIGHT NOW, WE WOULDN'T BE HELPLESS. THAT'S IMPORTANT. YEAH, I KNOW THAT, BUT IT'S --IT'S LIKE THE TIME YOUR FATHER SENT US THATMOOSE HEAD FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY. IT'S JUST NOT US. WE'RE NOT GOING TO HANG THE GUNOVER THE FIREPLACE. WE'RE NOT HANGINGTHE MOOSE HEAD THERE, EITHER. LET'S NOT GET INTOTHAT ARGUMENT AGAIN. I WAS WRONGABOUT THE MOOSE HEAD. LET IT STAY IN ALEX'S ROOM. OKAY. ALL I'M SAYING IS THAT WE'RE GOING TO PUT THE GUNIN A DRAWER AND FORGET ABOUT IT. ARE YOU WITH ME ON THIS? -I'M WILLING TO TRY.-ALL RIGHT. I'LL KEEP THE GUN IN MY DRAWER. WE'LL KEEP THE BULLETS IN YOURS. WELL, HERE I GO. I'M PICKING UP THE GUN NOW. I'VE GOT THE GUN, AND I'M TAKING ITTO THE DRESSER... OPENING THE DRAWER, AND I'M PUTTINGTHE GUN INSIDE... CLOSING THE DRAWER. PUT THE BULLETS AWAYFOR ME. MY GOD, ELYSE!YOU COULD HAVE KILLED ME! BULLETS ARE ONLY DANGEROUS WHEN THEY COMEDIRECTLY OUT OF A GUN. OKAY, NOW I'LL TELL THE KIDS. YOU DON'T HAVE TO TIPTOE,STEVEN. GUNS DON'T GO OFF BY THEMSELVES. YOU'D MAKEA LOUSY DEFENSE LAWYER. ALEX, MALLORY, JEN-- -HI, DAD.-HI. UM, WE WERE JUST COMING UPTO KISS YOU BOTH GOOD NIGHT. WE HAVEN'T EVENHAD DINNER YET. WE MIGHT FORGET. WE DIDN'T WANT TO TAKEANY CHANCES. WHY DON'T YOU COME ON IN?WE WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ANYWAY. YEAH, WE THOUGHTSOMETHING WAS UP WHEN YOU TWO SNUCK UP HERE WITHTHAT PACKAGE AND SHUT THE DOOR. KIDS, WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO SEE IS STRICTLY OFF-LIMITSTO ALL OF YOU. AND IF YOU WEREN'TMATURE ENOUGH, I WOULDN'T LET YOU SEE ITAT ALL. WHEN DID YOU START WEARINGCOLORED UNDERWEAR, DAD? OH. WRONG DRAWER. BUT, UH, DON'T TOUCHTHAT STUFF, EITHER. WOW, A GUN! CAN I TAKE THATTO SCHOOL FOR SHOW-AND-TELL? ABSOLUTELY NOT!YOU'RE NEVER TO TOUCH IT. WE ONLY SHOWED IT TO YOU BECAUSE WE DON'T WANT YOUTO STUMBLE UPON IT BY ACCIDENT. BUT WE TRUST YOU ENOUGH TO KNOWTHAT YOU'LL LEAVE IT ALONE. I DON'T GET IT. I THOUGHTYOU TWO WERE AGAINST GUNS. COME OVER HERE AND SIT DOWN. WE'LL TRY AND EXPLAIN ITTO YOU. UH, THIS ISN'T GONNA REQUIREANOTHER FAMILY MEETING, IS IT? NO, NO, NO. LOOK, MOMMYAND I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH. AND WE'LL DO WHATEVER WE HAVE TOTO MAKE SURE YOU'RE SAFE. WE'D BE A LOT HAPPIER IF THERE WERE NO SUCH THINGSAS GUNS IN THE WORLD, BUT WE CAN'T IGNORE THEM. IF A GUN WILL KEEP SOMEONEFROM HURTING US, THEN, UH, WE'LL HAVE TO MAKETHAT CONCESSION. WE STILL BELIEVE IN EVERYTHINGWE'VE ALWAYS BELIEVED IN. WE HAVEN'T CHANGED.IT'S JUST THE WORLD HAS CHANGED. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? IS THAT THE BIGGEST GUNTHEY HAD? WOULD YOU PREFER A FLAMETHROWERAND SOME GRENADES? OKAY, NOW, LOOK,I THINK WE SHOULD JUST TRY AND PUT THE GUNSOUT OF OUR MINDS. HOPEFULLY, WE'LL NEVER HAVETO TAKE IT OUT OF THE DRAWER, SO LET'S JUST FORGETIT'S THERE, OKAY? -OKAY.-YEAH. OKAY. WHAT DO YOU SAYWE GO DOWNSTAIRS AND EAT? -MM.-YEAH. GREAT. WHAT ARE WE HAVING? HAMBURGERS ON SESAME-SEED GUNS. BUNS. GOING HUNTING? THOUGHT YOU WERE ASLEEP. STEVEN, YOU'VE BEEN UPFOUR TIMES TO CHECK THE GUN. I DON'T THINKIT'S GOING ANYWHERE. I'M SORRY, HONEY. IT'S JUSTMAKING ME A LITTLE NERVOUS. DO YOU THINK MOTHBALLSARE BAD FOR THE GUN? IF THEY ARE, THEN WE'LLJUST SHOOT THE MOTHS. I DON'T KNOW, ELYSE. EVER SINCE THE ROBBERY, I'VEBEEN A LITTLE EXTRA CAUTIOUS. IT'S AFFECTED US ALL. I HAVEN'T JUST BEEN WORRYINGABOUT THE GUN, EITHER. I CHECKED THE KIDSSIX TIMES TONIGHT. CHECKED THE CAR.ONE OF THE TIRES IS LOW. THE PLANTS ARE HOLDING. I'M WORRIED ABOUT ALEX, TOO, SLEEPING ALL THE WAYOVER AT JIMMY BARKHAM'S HOUSE. THE BARKHAMS LIVE NEXT DOOR. LET'S NOT SPLIT HAIRS, ELYSE.HE'S NOT IN HIS BED. GET SOME REST, SWEETIE. KNOW WHAT I ADMIRE MOSTABOUT YOU, ELYSE? MY INCOMPARABLE CHARMAND BEAUTY? YOUR ABILITY TO FALL ASLEEPIN ANY SITUATION. THAT WAS MY NEXT GUESS. [ GLASS SHATTERS ] WHAT WAS THAT? I DON'T KNOW. [ CLATTER ]OH! SOMEBODY'S DOWNSTAIRS! STAY HERE. I'M GOING DOWN. -STOP WHERE YOU ARE!-AAH! COME ON. GET THE LIGHT. DAD! DAD, OPEN UP. IT'S ME, ALEX, YOUR FIRSTBORN. ALEX, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! I LIVE HERE, REMEMBER? AND YOU'RESUPPOSED TO BE AT JIMMY'S! WE HAD A BIG FIGHTOVER SOCIAL SECURITY. -HE WAS FOR IT.-OH! I-I-I FELT I COULDN'TCOMPROMISE MY PRINCIPLES AND STAY THERE. I DROPPED SOME THINGSIN THE CLOSET. I HOPE I DIDN'T WAKE YOU. WAKE US? YEAH, ALEX,YOU SCARED US TO DEATH. WE THOUGHTYOU WERE A PROWLER. IF YOU HADN'T SPOKEN UP,I MIGHT HAVE... CHALLENGED METO A GAME OF TENNIS? WHERE IS THE GUN, STEVEN? I-I-I WENT TO GET IT.I OPENED THE DRAWER. I EVEN PICKED IT UP. [ SIGHS ] I JUST COULDN'T DO IT. I GUESS I WAS JUST AFRAIDSOMEBODY WOULD GET HURT. I KNOW,AND I LOVE YOU FOR IT. WELL... SO DO I. LISTEN. LISTEN. T-THIS WHOLE THINGHAS SHAKEN ME UP A LITTLE BIT, SO, UH, IF YOU DON'T MIND,I-I NEED A DRINK. YEAH. I THINK THE SCOTCH IS --WAIT A MINUTE. THOUGHT I COULDSLIP THAT ONE BY YOU. IS IT SAFETO COME DOWN NOW? YEAH. YEAH. IT'S SAFE.IT WAS JUST ALEX. -DID YOU SHOOT HIM, DAD?-NO. NO. THERE'S GOING TO BE NOSHOOTING IN THIS HOUSE. NO GUNS. WE'RE TAKING IT BACKIN THE MORNING. RIGHT, ELYSE? RIGHT -- WHEN YOUBELIEVED IN SOMETHING AS LONG AS WE HAVE,YOU CAN'T CHANGE OVERNIGHT. I KNOW. I REALIZED THATTHE MINUTE I PICKED UP THE GUN. GUNS HAVE NO PLACEIN OUR LIVES. WE'VE WORN OUTTOO MANY PAIRS OF SNEAKERS TRYING TO GET PEOPLETO PUT GUNS DOWN. GOOD. I HAVE TO ADMITI HAVEN'T FELT REAL COMFORTABLE SINCE WE'VE HAD ITIN THE HOUSE. GUNS AREN'T THE RIGHT IMAGEFOR YOU GUYS, ANYWAY. DON'T YOU GUYS STILL BELIEVETHAT ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE? CAREFUL, JENNIFER.DON'T GET THEM STARTED. DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE STAGEDTHAT ANTI-WAR SIT-IN ON THE STEPSOF THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT? TOO LATE.THEY'RE BACK IN THE '60s. OF COURSE I REMEMBER.THAT WAS A GREAT DAY. WE BEAT THE NATIONAL GUARD 6-1IN THE FRISBEE TOURNAMENT. I HOPE YOU'RE SATISFIED,JENNIFER. HEY, LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE. AT LEAST IT'S NOT THAT STORY OF HOW THEY DANCED NAKEDIN THE RAIN AT WOODSTOCK. DO YOU REMEMBERWHAT YOU SAID TO ME JUST BEFORETHEY TOOK US ALL AWAY? YOU SAID, "THE DAY I PICK UPA WEAPON AGAINST ANOTHER MAN IS THE DAY I ADMIT DEFEATAS A HUMAN BEING." I SAID THAT? I THINK IT WAS YOU. WERE YOU WEARINGA PLAID SHIRT? OH, ELYSE. I-I'M TEASING.I KNOW IT WAS YOU. BUT, YOU KNOW, I REMEMBERTHINKING, WHEN YOU SAID THAT, "THIS GUY IS REALLY DEEP." OKAY, SO MAYBE A GUNISN'T THE ANSWER FOR US. WE'LL PROBABLY STILLBE SCARED FOR A WHILE, BUT I'D RATHER LIVE WITH THATFEAR THAN TO LIVE WITH A GUN. ME TOO. WE'LL JUST HAVE TOKEEP SEARCHING FORTHE RIGHT THING FOR US. WOULD YOU CONSIDER LAND MINESIN THE FRONT LAWN? NO. WE'LL HAVE MAPS. HOW ABOUT BODYGUARDS? THE CAPTAIN OF THE FOOTBALL TEAMLOOKS REAL STRONG. NICE TRY. I'VE GOT IT! KILLER BEES! [ LAUGHTER ]